孤独拥抱，自我疗愈与自强，独处之美。

Solitary embrace, self-healing and self-reliance, the beauty of solitude.

1. 正如摩西奶奶曾说：“真正的爱自己，不是牺牲时间和精力去打拼辉煌的未来，而是在当下，努力去做自己喜欢做的和有趣的事情，让自己的内心充盈着喜悦，让现在的每一天，都以自己喜爱的方式度过。

1. As Grandma Moses once said, "True self-love is not about sacrificing time and energy to strive for a brilliant future, but rather to make an effort in the present to do what you like and find interesting, filling your heart with joy and allowing each day to pass in a way that you love.

2. 不要指望别人会与你共情，也不要妄想有人关心你，体贴你，呵护你，没有人会把你的悲伤当回事。

2. Don't expect others to empathize with you, nor indulge in the fantasy that someone will care for you, cherish you, or protect you. No one will take your sadness seriously.

3. 唯一的办法就是：打开天牢，让情绪重见天日。首先把自己心头的怨恨和伤痛，毫无保留地倾倒出来。你可以哭诉、可以大叫、可以咒骂，甚至可以对着枕头来一顿猛捶，当情绪全部宣泄后，才能开始尝试着去宽恕。

3. The only way is to: open the heavenly prison, and let emotions see the light of day. First, pour out the resentment and pain in your heart without reservation. You can cry out, you can shout, you can curse, and even you can hammer your pillow fiercely. Only after all emotions have been vented can you start to try to forgive.

4. 去拥抱好好爱自己，接纳自己的不完美，不要对自己要求那么苛刻，不攀比不抱怨，不依附于别人，多关爱自己。

4. Embrace yourself and love yourself well. Accept your imperfections, don't be too harsh on yourself, don't compare or complain, don't rely on others, and take more care of yourself.

5. 在第三阶段，我们从外在困境转向了内在，去看见自我，去发掘问题的根源，为自己创造出新的转机。而且我们也学会了不再强求改变，以一种无为的心态，去看待世界、看待自己的人生，去接纳生命中的变幻与无常。于是，不完美的你重拾自信和快乐，开启崭新的美好人生。

5. In the third stage, we shifted from external difficulties to the inner realm, to see ourselves, to uncover the root of the problems, and to create new opportunities for ourselves. Moreover, we also learned to stop forcing change, adopting a mindset of non-action, to view the world and our lives, and to embrace the changes and impermanence in life. As a result, the imperfect you regains confidence and happiness, and embarks on a new, beautiful life.

6. 而制服黑暗力量，只有一个办法，就是叫出它的名字。格得花了很多时间，就是找不出黑影的名字。终于，他被黑影逼到了悬崖边，格得绝望了，转身、面对着黑影，大声喊出了自己的名字。刹那间，黑影瞬间消失了。这是一个隐喻故事，就是告诉我们：黑影就是自己，转身面对自己，才能收服黑影。

6. There is only one way to subdue the dark forces, and that is to call out its name. Ged spent a lot of time but could not find the name of the shadow. Finally, he was forced to the edge of a cliff by the shadow, and Ged despaired. He turned around, faced the shadow, and shouted his own name aloud. Instantly, the shadow vanished. This is an allegorical story that tells us: the shadow is oneself; by turning to face oneself, one can conquer the shadow.

7. 原来，她在结婚前，有两个男人在追求她，虽然她更喜欢另一位，但那位没有经济基础，所以，她选择了现在的老公。结婚后，她一切以家庭为重，把工作外的所有时间和精力都放在了家里。结果她越来越不快乐，抱怨越来越多，跟老公吵架的次数也越来越频繁。

7. It turns out that before getting married, she had two men pursuing her. Although she preferred the other one, the latter didn't have a solid economic foundation, so she chose her current husband. After marriage, she prioritized the family above all else, dedicating all her time and energy outside of work to the household. As a result, she became increasingly unhappy, her complaints grew, and the frequency of arguments with her husband increased.

8. 一段非常有力量的话：

8. A very powerful statement:

9. 那要怎么宽恕呢？当有人伤害你，痛苦发生了，你就与痛苦在一起，进入伤痛，体验痛苦，不要急着逃开，给痛苦一点时间，时间到了，痛苦自然会转化，宽恕之心就会油然而生，疗愈自然也就发生了。

9. How can one forgive? When someone has hurt you and the pain has occurred, be with the pain, enter into the hurt, and experience the pain. Don't rush to escape. Give the pain some time. When the time comes, the pain will naturally transform, and the heart of forgiveness will naturally arise, and healing will also naturally occur.

10. 每一个人或多或少都患有不同程度的心理疾病，现今快节奏的当下，多少人正在焦虑与抑郁的路上，莫名情绪低落，丧失自信，担忧害怕恐惧，思想无法集中，不能工作，甚至产生自杀念头，觉得人生没意义，整日整年处于自我摧残与毁灭中。

10. Everyone, to varying degrees, suffers from different levels of psychological illness. In today's fast-paced world, how many people are on the road to anxiety and depression, experiencing inexplicable mood swings, losing self-confidence, worrying, being afraid, and full of fear, unable to concentrate, unable to work, and even contemplating suicide, feeling that life has no meaning, and spending day after day and year after year in self-torture and destruction.

11. 越来越不喜欢到人群之中扎堆，越来越沉默，不是因为丧失了与人打交道的能力，而是没有了逢场作戏的兴趣。

11. I am increasingly不喜欢 to mingle with crowds, and I am becoming more and more silent. This is not because I have lost the ability to interact with people, but rather because I no longer have the interest in playing roles for the sake of social occasions.

12. ​人生在世总有风雨，求人是一种依赖，可以依赖一时，却无法依赖一世。靠山山会倒，靠人人会跑。最靠谱的，唯有自强不息的自己。”

12. Life on earth is always fraught with ups and downs. Asking for help is a form of dependence, which one can rely on for a moment, but not for a lifetime. When you rely on a mountain, the mountain may collapse; when you rely on a person, the person may run away. The most reliable one is only the self who never stops self-improvement.

13. 你也许很成功，人也开朗，身体也不错，可是在你内心深处的那个小孩却可能与你表现出来的不同，可能很健康，也可能饱受创伤，却无法发声，还一直被你忽略着、压抑着、幽禁着。作者通过说故事的方法，让我们认识到内心小孩的感受很重要，这将决定你这辈子是否快乐，快乐比完美更重要。让我们拥抱内在的小孩，给他爱和温暖，让自己在不完美中，越来越快乐！

13. You may be very successful, outgoing, and in good health, but the child within you might be different from what you show to the world. It could be healthy, or it might have suffered from traumas, unable to speak out, constantly ignored, suppressed, and confined by you. The author uses storytelling to make us realize that the feelings of the inner child are important, which will determine whether you are happy in this lifetime. Happiness is more important than perfection. Let's embrace our inner child, give it love and warmth, and become happier and happier in our imperfections!

14. 作者还

15. 好了，以上就是今天讲解的全部内容，下面我们简单回顾一下。

14. The author also... 15. Well, that's all for today's presentation. Now let's briefly review what we've discussed.

16. 天行健，君子以自强不息，地势坤，君子以厚德载物。

16. The heavens are firm and majestic; a gentleman never ceases to strengthen himself. The earth is expansive and nurturing; a gentleman carries the world upon his broad virtue.

17. 心情受到伤害的时候，我们要学会自我疗愈。轻轻的告诉自己，泥泞只是暂时的，明天将是阳光灿烂，别人不值得我们烦恼，你的生活自己做主。

17. When our hearts are hurt, we need to learn to heal ourselves. Gently remind yourself that the muddy path is only temporary, tomorrow will be bright and sunny, others are not worth our worries, and you are the master of your own life.

18. 作者以自己曾罹抑郁症的亲身经历为背景，在每个章节中分别以自己与每个现代人都时常面临的焦虑和抑郁、丧失信心、沮丧、恐惧、绝望、孤独的心境为主题，给出了结合正念有效缓解这些负面情绪的温暖建议，还有130多幅这些看似简单的画作中潜藏着巨大的治愈力量。

18. The author uses his own personal experience of depression as the backdrop, and in each chapter, he takes themes such as anxiety and depression that everyone faces frequently, loss of confidence, despondency, fear, despair, and loneliness, and offers warm suggestions for effectively alleviating these negative emotions through mindfulness. In addition, over 130 paintings, which at first glance may seem simple, are actually imbued with great healing power.

19. 现在我们已经认回了生命里的孤单，认回了需要被肯定的自己，接下来，我们就来认回自己的独特性，这才是真正的爱自己。

19. Now that we have acknowledged the solitude in our lives and recognized the need for validation in ourselves, the next step is to acknowledge our uniqueness. This is the true way to love ourselves.

20. “你若不勤奋，谁帮你都没用，你若不努力，谁扶你都不稳。不要指望别人，你会委曲求全，不要依靠别人，你得看人脸色。

20. "If you are not diligent, no one can help you; if you do not strive, no one can support you stably. Don't rely on others, or you will have to compromise; don't depend on others, or you will have to watch their faces."

21. 一个人想要改变自己窘迫的现状，想要拥有更加美好的生活，想要获得生命的灿烂和尊严，就不可以在舒适区温水煮青蛙，蹉跎岁月，而是要撸起袖子加油干，咬紧牙关往前走，以精卫填海的决心，抵达自己想要的美好。

21. If a person wants to change their embarrassing situation, desires a better life, and seeks the brilliance and dignity of life, they cannot be boiled like a frog in the comfort zone, wasting their time. Instead, they should roll up their sleeves, work hard, bite the bullet, and move forward. With the determination of Jingwei filling the sea, they should reach the beautiful life they desire.

22. 我们也回想一下，自己有没有做过好人，或者不好意思拒绝帮忙，是不是希望由此获得别人的肯定和认可。如果是的话，承认和接受这个事实，认回这个想被肯定的小孩，然后你就挣脱了这道枷锁，获得了心灵上的自由。

22. Let's also reflect on whether we have ever done good deeds, or been embarrassed to refuse help, or whether we hope to gain others' affirmation and recognition through this. If so, acknowledge and accept this fact, reclaim the child within who wants to be affirmed, and then you will break free from this yoke, gaining spiritual freedom.

23. 《柔软的刺猬》是一本能带给你无限勇气和治愈力量并能够有效减轻个人压力的超暖心绘本。

23. "Soft Hedgehog" is a heartwarming picture book that brings you endless courage and healing power, and is effective in alleviating personal stress.

24. 而长期处于这种压力氛围下，作为家属的我也开始出现不同程度焦虑，向好朋友倾述内心烦恼时，她向我及家人

25. 打开此书便爱不释手，精美粉红色硬书皮，里边是彩色纸张，文字与动物插画相结合，光翻几下已爱不释手。

24. And having been in this stressful atmosphere for a long time, I, as a family member, have also started to experience varying degrees of anxiety. When I confide in my good friend about my inner troubles, she has recommended this book to me and my family. 25. Once I opened this book, I couldn't put it down. The exquisite pink hardcover is beautifully designed, with colorful pages and a combination of text and animal illustrations. Just flipping through it a few times has already made me love it.

26. 作者发现，原来自己需要独处，以及独立空间。这就是“独特性”。每个人都有自己的独特性，我们要看到自己的独特性，并且理解它、尊重它、支持它。我们不需要做好人，为了满足别人，而委屈自己。不尊重自己独特性的后果，就是把自己搞得人累、心累，抑郁不快乐，最后变得讨厌自己。

26. The author found that they needed solitude and independent space. This is what we call "uniqueness." Everyone has their own uniqueness, and we need to recognize our own, understand it, respect it, and support it. We do not have to be good people to satisfy others, and we should not compromise ourselves. The consequences of not respecting our own uniqueness are that we become physically and mentally exhausted, depressed, and unhappy, and eventually, we may even come to hate ourselves.

27. 回首过往，作者小时候家里穷，什么都缺，但也正因为这样的匮乏，让他必须自食其力，必须打拼，才能换得生活和需求的满足，作者读到了博士学位，成为了赫赫有名的心理治疗师，出版了那么多本书，帮助了众多的读者，这一切成就让他活得很有尊严。

27. Looking back, the author grew up in a poor family where they lacked everything. But it was precisely this lack that forced him to fend for himself, to strive hard, and only through that could he satisfy his needs and life. The author earned a Ph.D., became a well-known psychotherapist, published so many books, and helped numerous readers. All these achievements have given him a very dignified life.

28. 人生之路就是这样，磕磕绊绊，烦恼不断，你越想要改变，越是改变不了。当我们不再强求改变，以无为的心态，去接纳生命时，生命就会发生改变。

28. Life's path is just like this, with twists and turns,烦恼 never ceases, the more you want to change, the harder it is to do so. When we stop striving for change and adopt a state of non-action, embracing life as it is, life itself will undergo change.

29. 现在我们已经认回了孤单着、需要被肯定和一个个独特的小孩，走完了疗愈之旅的第一个阶段。接下来，我们进入第二阶段：疗愈，拥抱自己的内在小孩。

29. Now that we have reclaimed the lonely, needy, and unique child within us, and completed the first stage of the healing journey, we move on to the second stage: healing, embracing our inner child.

30. 要知道，如果只是发泄怒火，不去追根溯源，不去认回内心那个受伤的小孩，就不可能治愈自己，就会让这个伤痛，在下一个同类事件上，再次发作，反反复复，永远不能愈合。

30. To be aware that if one only vents anger without tracing the roots and without acknowledging the wounded child within, it is impossible to heal oneself. This pain will then resurface again and again on similar events in the future, perpetually unable to heal.

31. 而这在本书中，作者揭开自己的伤疤，勇敢地讲述了自己的不幸的童年和霸道自私的母亲，还分享了许多真实个案，他正是通过这种讲故事的方式，疗愈着自己，同时也温暖和治愈了无数的读者。

31. And in this book, the author courageously opens up his own wounds, narrating his unfortunate childhood and his domineering and selfish mother. He also shares many real-life cases, through which he heals himself by telling stories, while also warming and healing countless readers.

32. 我们来听一个被伤害的故事，这回故事的主角不是作者了，而是他的一个来访者。这位来访者的丈夫精神出轨了，不过他与对方只是互有好感，并没发生性关系，而且马上就回归家庭了，还百般讨好自己的妻子，可是，这没用！这位女士就是打不开这个心结，过不去这个坎。她经常陷入歇斯底里的疯狂暴怒，不但乱发脾气，辱骂丈夫，还使用武力，对丈夫拳打脚踢。她自己也知道这样很过分，可就是无法克制自己的愤怒，于是来找作者咨询。

32. Let's listen to a story of hurt, where this time the protagonist is not the author, but one of his visitors. The visitor's husband had a mental affair, but it was just mutual feelings and there was no sexual relationship involved. He quickly returned to the family and tried his best to please his wife, but it was no use! The lady could not untangle this knot in her heart and could not get over this hurdle. She often fell into a fit of hysteria and rage, not only losing her temper and cursing her husband, but also resorting to violence, beating and kicking him. She herself knew that this was excessive, but she could not control her anger, and that's why she came to consult the author.

33. 自我安慰，暂时远离社交媒体，锻炼，补充身体所需能量，放松身体，尝试正念冥想。

33. Comfort yourself, temporarily disconnect from social media, exercise, replenish the energy your body needs, relax your body, and try mindful meditation.

34. 时间花在哪里，花就开在哪里。自强不息，一往无前，上天自然会把最好的惊喜馈赠给你。

34. Where you spend your time, that's where the flowers will bloom. With unwavering self-improvement and determination, the heavens will naturally bestow the best surprises upon you.

35. 我们继续来听作者的故事，前面已经说了作者喜欢发“好人卡”，这回他又做好事了。作者平时住在台北，不过他在台中有一个漂亮舒适的房子，尤其值得赞叹的是那个十多平米的露台，种了很多植物，绿意盎然，生机勃勃。作者有个朋友想离开父母，在一个新的环境里，开始自己的计划。作者很理解朋友的想法，于是主动邀请对方住到自己台中的家里。

35. Let's continue to listen to the author's story. As mentioned before, the author likes to give out "good person cards," and this time, he did another good deed. The author usually lives in Taipei, but he has a beautiful and comfortable house in Taichung. Particularly worth mentioning is the over-10-square-meter terrace, which is filled with plants, brimming with greenery and vitality. The author has a friend who wants to leave their parents and start their own plan in a new environment. The author understands his friend's thoughts and proactively invites the friend to stay in his Taichung home.

36. 你把时间花在床上，成就了自己的体重，你把时间花在吃上，成就了自己的疾病，你把时间花在玩上，成就了自己的颓废。相反，你把时间花在锻炼上，成就了自己的健康，你把成时间花在思考上，成就了自己的创造力，你把时间花在努力上，成就了自己的进步，你把时间花在拼搏上，成就了自己的灿烂。

36. You spend your time on the bed, you achieve your weight; you spend your time on eating, you achieve your diseases; you spend your time on playing, you achieve your decadence. Conversely, you spend your time on exercising, you achieve your health; you spend your time on thinking, you achieve your creativity; you spend your time on hard work, you achieve your progress; you spend your time on striving, you achieve your brilliance.

37. 父母因为生存问题，四处打工，对孩子的忽略，导致作者变得孤僻、自卑和压抑。即使长大成人，事业有成，独立、坚强又能干，但他的内心仍有一个小男孩在渴望着爱，渴望被呵护、被关注、被满足。对这个小男孩来说，爱的奶水不足，以及对需求的压抑，使得他与别人产生断裂，导致他很不合群。

37. Due to survival issues, the parents had to work everywhere, neglecting their children, which led the author to become solitary, self-conscious, and oppressive. Even as an adult with a successful career, independent, strong, and capable, there is still a little boy within him yearning for love, desiring to be cherished, attended to, and satisfied. For this little boy, insufficient "milk" of love and the suppression of needs caused a rift with others, making him very unsociable.

38. 这一场母女间的对话，因为母亲的忏悔，让年已半百的大姐从小受伤的灵魂得到了医治。这就是忏悔的力量，因为忏悔就是爱，而爱是最大的疗愈。

38. This conversation between mother and daughter, due to the mother's repentance, healed the wounded soul of the elder sister, who is over fifty years old. This is the power of repentance, because repentance is love, and love is the greatest healing.

39. 作者的母亲，由于自己原生家庭的问题，所以造成了她自私、冷漠、倔强、不讲理的个性。大姐是家里被母亲伤得最重的一个。有一次，大姐终于发飙了，把心里对母亲的怨恨统统说了出来。神奇的是，年迈的母亲竟然跟大姐说：“对不起，原谅我。”此话一出，大姐累积了四十多年的委屈，化成了泪水，一下子倾泻而出。

39. The author's mother, due to the issues in her own original family, developed a personality that was selfish, indifferent, stubborn, and unreasonable. The elder sister was the one who was hurt the most by the mother. There was a time when the elder sister finally lost her temper and vented all her resentment towards her mother. Amazingly, the elderly mother even said to the elder sister, "I'm sorry, forgive me." With these words, the elder sister's accumulated grievances of over forty years turned into tears and poured out all at once.

40. 这次要讲述的故事是作者的一个来访者，那个女孩子患了抑郁症，多次自杀未遂。原来她小时候曾经被家里的长辈性侵过，父母知道后，让她闭嘴，不能说出去。后来，母亲还带她去信教，教会的牧师用《圣经》里的话，教导她：“我们要宽恕我们的敌人”，希望她忘记这样严重的伤害，宽恕那个恶人。

40. The story to be told here is about an author's visitor, a girl who suffers from depression and has attempted suicide multiple times. It turns out that when she was young, she was sexually molested by an elder in her family. After her parents found out, they told her to keep silent and not to speak of it to anyone. Later, her mother even took her to a religious faith, and the pastor of the church used the words from the Bible to teach her: "We should forgive our enemies," hoping she would forget such a severe injury and forgive the evil person.

41. 好了，事不宜迟，我们马上就来学习这本《拥抱不完美：认回自己的故事疗愈之旅》。我们首先要做的，就是直面自己的过去，去认识孤单的自己、需要被肯定的自己、独一无二的自己。接下来，就是治疗被背叛撕开的伤口，用宽恕和忏悔之心来爱自己。最后，利用外在的困境，了解真正的自己，从而获得新的转机，同时，不强求改变，接受自己本来的样子，最终在不完美中，迎来更加美好的你。

41. Alright, there's no time to waste, let's dive into this book "Embracing Imperfection: A Healing Journey to Rediscover Your Own Story" right away. The first thing we need to do is face our past, get to know the lonely version of ourselves, the one in need of affirmation, and the unique individual that we are. Next, it's about healing the wounds torn open by betrayal, loving ourselves with hearts full of forgiveness and repentance. Finally, by making use of the external difficulties, we can understand the true self, gain a new opportunity, and at the same time, not strive for change, accept ourselves as we are, and ultimately, amidst imperfections, welcome a more beautiful version of you.

42. 作者可不想看到这个后果，于是当作者打算回台北的时候，忐忑地告诉朋友，自己对独立空间的需求很大，希望对方住到下个月就离开。朋友表示理解，同意了，作者终于松了一口气。

42. The author did not want to see this consequence, so when the author intended to return to Taipei, he nervously told his friend that he had a great need for personal space and hoped that the friend would leave by the next month. The friend showed understanding and agreed, and the author finally heaved a sigh of relief.

43. 于是，作者开始反思，自己乐善好施背后的真正动机到底是什么呢？这其实是“投射”行为。怎么说呢？因为作者过去是靠着勤工俭学才完成学业的，所以希望别人不用跟自己一样，要靠着节衣缩食、辛苦地赚学费，才能来上课。也就是说，作者想通过资助别人，“投射”去资助过去可怜的自己。这是作者想做好人的一个理由。

43. Then, the author began to reflect on what the true motivation behind their benevolence actually was. This is actually a "projection" behavior. How so? Because the author completed their education through hard work and frugality, they hope that others do not have to go through the same experience, having to save money by living modestly and toiling to earn tuition fees in order to attend classes. In other words, the author wants to "project" their support onto the poor self of the past through helping others. This is one of the reasons why the author wants to be a good person.

44. 想要消除愤怒，第一步就是诚实地面对自己，承认自己被背叛、承认自己很受伤、承认自己很生气，并且尽情发泄自己的怒气。只有如实地去面对自己的这些情绪，才有可能进一步去反思：真正让我们受伤的源头是什么？这就是用新伤觉知旧伤。

44. The first step to eliminate anger is to be honest with oneself, admit being betrayed, admit being deeply hurt, admit being very angry, and let out one's anger as much as possible. Only by facing these emotions honestly can one possibly further reflect on: What is the real source that causes us harm? This is what we mean by perceiving new injuries through the awareness of old ones.

45. 可是，在访问中，马斯克在谈到特斯拉面临危机时，被权威人士，尤其是被自己心目中的英雄和偶像极力否定和阻挠时，他的眼眶湿润了。“钢铁侠”马斯克，也不是无坚不摧的，在他的心底里，同样住着一个小孩，一个渴求关怀和爱护的小孩。

45. However, during the visit, Musk's eyes welled up with tears when talking about the crises facing Tesla, being strongly denied and obstructed by authorities, especially by his own heroes and idols. "Iron Man" Musk is not invincible either; deep down in his heart, there also lives a child, a child longing for care and affection.

46. 好了，《拥抱不完美：认回自己的故事疗愈之旅》这本书就分享到这里。读完以后，你对这本书有什么看法或者见解，都欢迎你在评论区留言，与书友们一同讨论。如果你有兴趣，可以选择阅读原书，获得更多新的体验；感谢你的收听，我们下本书再见。

46. Well, that's all for sharing the book "Embrace Imperfection: A Healing Journey to Rediscover Your Own Story." What are your thoughts or insights after reading this book? Feel free to leave a comment in the comment section to discuss with fellow book lovers. If you're interested, you can choose to read the original book for more new experiences; thank you for listening, we'll meet again for the next book.

47. 大家好，这一期为你讲述的书是《拥抱不完美：认回自己的故事疗愈之旅》。

47. Hello everyone, the book I am introducing to you in this issue is "Embrace Imperfection: A Healing Journey to Rediscover Your Own Story."

48. 我们都害怕受到伤害，可我们在跌跌撞撞的成长历程中，会受到无数的伤害。值得庆幸的是，伤害并不是只有坏处，我们可以让新伤来觉知旧伤，用新伤疗愈旧伤。

48. We all fear being hurt, but in our bumpy journey of growth, we will endure countless injuries. Thankfully, injuries are not all bad; we can allow new injuries to be aware of old ones, and use new injuries to heal old injuries.