1. 长的包子样，就别怨狗跟着。

1. If the bun is long, don't complain when the dog follows.

2. 这世上没有无缘无故的爱 也没有无缘无故的恨 只有无缘无故的好端端我 啥也没干为啥又胖了

2. There is no love in this world without a reason, nor is there any hate without a cause. Only I, who did nothing, why did I gain weight all of a sudden?

3. 好兄弟就像避孕套，你捅多大篓子都能帮你兜着。

3. Good brothers are like condoms, they can cover up for you no matter how big of a mess you make.

4. 曾经你也对我说了无数次的我爱你，可究竟有几次是真心的

4. You have told me countless times "I love you," but how many times were those words genuinely spoken from your heart?

5. 你永远不懂我的心，我们注意没结局。

5. You'll never understand my heart; we've never noticed any end.

6. 朋友不分性别，但是男女朋友不分性别就不好了吧?>

6. Friends are not divided by gender, but isn't it not good to have boyfriends and girlfriends without gender distinction?

7. ￠你可知，上天是不公平的，你可以选择，爱我或者不爱我，而我却只能选择，爱你或者更爱你～，-

7. Do you know that heaven is not fair? You can choose to love me or not to love me, but I can only choose to love you or to love you even more. ~

8. 丧心病狂无节操必备万能回复 “昨晚你在床上可不是这么说的”

8. Essential all-purpose reply for shameless and unprincipled people: "Last night in bed, you weren't saying that."

9. 那一年我热血沸腾的说自己能坚持下来自己的梦想

9. That year, I was full of passion and said that I could persevere with my dreams.

10. 为什么要穿三角裤？因为省钱又省布。

10. Why wear briefs? Because it saves money and fabric.

11. 要给我的爱，如果你还在灌概，要我等待，我就等待。

11. If you are still indulging in love, and ask me to wait, I will wait.

12. 愿成大学霸，文理全不怕

12. May I become a university ace, fear neither literature nor science.

13. 把你捧上天堂， 也可以亲手把你摔向地狱

13. I can lift you to heaven with my hands, or I can also throw you into hell myself.

14. ━我永远都不会浪费每一秒钟能用来陪你的时间。づ

14. I will never waste a single second that could be spent with you.

15. EXO的History，将成为这个时代的主题曲！

15. EXO's "History" will become the theme song of this era!

16. 冷脾气 三分钟热度， 不爱麻烦和被麻烦。

16. Cold-tempered, with a three-minute enthusiasm, doesn't like to cause trouble or be troubled.

17. 面子不是给的 是争的 那女人不是追的 要抢的

17. Face is not given, it is fought for; that woman is not pursued, she is to be seized.

18. 女人如衣服 那姐就是你穿不起的那件！

18. A woman is like a dress; that sister is the one you can't afford to wear!

19. 面对你的时候，我终于知道为什么我一天的心情都不好了

19. Facing you, I finally know why my mood has been bad all day.

20. “你是我枯水年纪里的一场雨你来的酣畅淋漓我淋的一病不起。”

20. "You are the rain that falls during my barren years, arriving with such fervor and intensity that I was struck ill from the soaking."

21. 不是你的牛逼让我沉默，而是你的傻逼让我无语

21. It's not your牛逼 that makes me silent, but your傻逼 that leaves me speechless.

22. 不删你，就是想看看你怎样为那个女人写心情。

22. I didn't delete you, I just wanted to see how you write feelings for that woman.

23. 我不受欢迎我做不到让所有人都喜欢我但我会做好我自己

23. I'm not popular; I can't make everyone like me, but I will do my best to be myself.

24. 现在的社会是：头脑社会，金钱拿人。你可以很贵，也可以免费。

24. The current society is one of the mind and money. You can be expensive or free.

25. 别说你无罪，姐让你流泪！

25. Don't say you're innocent; you'll make me cry!

26. 我给你1生1世 不变的真心

26. I give you one life and one lifetime of unchanging sincerity.

27. EXO不红～天理难容！EXO不帅～世界淘汰！

27. EXO isn't popular ~ It's heaven's justice! EXO isn't handsome ~ The world has discarded it!

28. 我不高贵，但不是每个男人都有机会

28. I am not noble, but not every man has the chance.

29. 请允许我把我们相忘于江湖。

29. Please allow me to forget each other in the vast world.

30. 生活中的每一件事，都可以用三个字总结：会过去。

30. Everything in life can be summarized in three words: Will pass.

31. 发誓，除了吃的，绝对不会去抢自己姐妹喜欢的任何东西。

31. Swear that I will never steal anything that my sister likes, other than food.

32. 一起闯祸一起进政治处一起打闹一起跷课一起...许多许多的一起，明年就会分道扬镳了。

32. We have caused trouble together, entered the Political Department together, played around together, skipped classes together... There have been countless things we've done together, but next year, we will part ways.

33. 给我一个拥抱，我会还你一个明天

33. Give me a hug, and I'll give you a tomorrow in return.

34. 和我玩？ 你必输 弄不好， 还得哭

34. Want to play with me? You're bound to lose. And who knows, you might even end up crying.

35. 马航要让全世界知道，今年的空难被他们包了。

35. Malaysia Airlines wants the whole world to know that they have covered up this year's air disaster.

36. 随便的意思是我懒得想但是你必须想出我满意的

36. "随便" means "It's up to you," but it also implies that I'm too lazy to think about it, but you must come up with something that satisfies me.