在繁星点点的夜空中，一颗颗顽皮的星星仿佛在窃窃私语，它们以独特的语言，讲述着一个个关于“脱发的调戏段子的故事”。今天，就让我们揭开这神秘的面纱，一同走进“脱发的调戏段子”的奇幻世界。

Amidst the twinkling night sky, each mischievous star seems to be whispering secrets to each other, telling one story after another about "jokes that mock baldness" in their unique language. Today, let us lift the veil of mystery and delve into the magical world of "jokes that mock baldness" together.

1. 13压力具有两面性，适时调度尤为重。适当压力促进步，效率体现工作中。繁重压力毁健康，身心疲惫不自知。如今社会压力重，减压工作需进行。

1. Pressure has a dual nature, and timely adjustment is particularly important. Appropriate pressure can promote progress, and efficiency is reflected in work. Overbearing pressure ruins health, and physical and mental exhaustion go unnoticed. In today's society, there is heavy pressure, and work to reduce pressure must be carried out.

2. 13想想每天带着口罩不修边幅，被晒黑的肤色暗沉，松垮眼镜耷拉在鼻上。偶尔呼出的空气在眼镜上起了雾，日渐上移的发际线。嘀咕着要好好收拾一番，第二天一大早起来“唉，算了吧，些许麻烦”碎碎念念

2. 13 Think about the daily routine of wearing a mask, looking disheveled, with a sun-damaged complexion that is dark and sallow, and glasses that are loosely hanging on the nose. Occasionally, the air you exhale creates fog on the glasses, and the hairline keeps receding higher. Mumbling to yourself, "I should tidy up properly," you rise early the next morning, only to think, "Ah, forget it, a bit of trouble," and continue with the endless grumbles.

3. 28人生每一次创伤都是一种成熟，每一次失去都是一种获得。

3. Each time we experience a wound in life is a kind of maturity, and each loss is a kind of gain.

4. 30随着年龄的增大，更喜欢和家人在一起的感觉。分开都是不敢想象的。珍惜。爱你们。

4. 30 As we get older, we increasingly prefer the feeling of being with family. The thought of being apart is unimaginable. Cherish. Love you all.

5. 听说看武打片能减肥，因为里面经常说，你快受(瘦)死吧!

5. I've heard that watching martial arts movies can help you lose weight, because they often say, "You're almost (skinny) to death!"

6. 21有人说，当你晚上失眠时，那是因为你出现在别人的梦里。

6. 21 People say that when you can't sleep at night, it's because you appear in someone else's dream.

7. 59藏在心底的话并不是有意要去隐瞒，只是并不是所有的疼痛都可以呐喊。

7. The words hidden in the heart are not intentionally meant to be concealed; it's just that not all pain can be shouted out.

8. 12大家都在内卷的时候，我就按时吃饭睡觉，多多运动，让自己身体健康，卷死他们！

8.12 While everyone is caught up in the "guanxi" (a metaphor for competitive social climbing), I stick to eating and sleeping on time, exercise as much as possible, and keep myself physically healthy to outdo them all!

9. 10很平常的一天，洗头因为头发长，洗掉的头发看起来就很多，就去剪了齐耳的短发，再洗头发现果然看起来掉的头发少了很多。

9. It was a very ordinary day, the 10th. Since my hair is long, it seemed like I shed a lot of hair when I washed it, so I decided to get a bob cut. After washing my hair again, I found that indeed, I shed much less hair.

10. 36脱发自古就然，但好象现代人脱发现象更严重，似乎已成为流行病，虽然并不影响生活，但有损个人形象。有一次，在路上偶遇一位两三年不见的朋友，人的变化倒不大，但他的脑袋倒使人暗吃了一惊，他的花白头发稀稀拉拉的，使我一下子就联想起**《功夫》里练蛤蟆功的由梁小龙扮演的那个角色。我也不敢问他怎么会这样，免得伤了人家的自尊心。

10. Hair loss has been a natural phenomenon since ancient times, but it seems that the hair loss in modern times is more severe, almost becoming an epidemic. Although it doesn't affect daily life, it does damage a person's image. Once, I encountered a friend I hadn't seen for two or three years on the street. The friend didn't look much different, but his head gave me a shock. His prematurely white hair was sparse, and it immediately reminded me of the character played by Liu Xiaolong in the movie "Kung Fu," who practiced the toad skill. I didn't dare to ask him why it was like that, in case I hurt his pride.

11. 12习惯晚睡不叫失眠，就像你从未在我身边不算失恋。

11. Not being able to sleep late doesn't mean you have insomnia, just like not having been with me doesn't mean you've experienced a breakup.

12. 32天将降大任于是人也，必先苦其心志，劳其筋骨，饿其体肤，空乏其身，行拂乱其所为。

12. It is said that in 32 days, great responsibilities will be bestowed upon a person. Before this, they must undergo hardship in their heart and will, toil their muscles and bones, starve their bodies, be impoverished, and disrupt the course of their actions.

13. 34记住该记住的，忘记该忘记的。改变能改变的，接受不能改变的。

13. 34 Remember what should be remembered, forget what should be forgotten. Change what can be changed, and accept what cannot be changed.

14. 19女人要有骨气，要么谈恋爱到结婚，要么高傲的单身。

14. A woman should either have the backbone to date until marriage or proudly remain single.

15. 1婚纱照，头发都快秃了，发福油腻，不得不感叹岁月是把杀猪刀。

15.1 Wedding photos, with my hair almost bald and my body becoming fat and greasy, I can't help but sigh that time is a cruel butcher's knife.

16. 不知道是因为秋天，还是头皮觉得我要出家了。我的头发最近掉得很厉害。

16. I'm not sure if it's because of autumn or because my scalp feels like I'm about to become a monk. My hair has been falling out a lot recently.

17. 工作的最高境界就是看着别人上班，领着别人的工资。

17. The highest level of work is to watch others work and receive others' salaries.

18. 15真正了解无常的含义，当你痛苦时，你要想这痛苦不是永恒的，当你快乐时，你要想这快乐也不是永恒的。

18. Truly understand the meaning of impermanence. When you are in pain, remember that this pain is not eternal. When you are joyful, remember that this joy is also not eternal.

19. 34空有一颗要减肥的心，却长了一条胖子的命。

19. With a desire to lose weight, one has the fate of a胖子 (fat person).

20. 4一觉醒来双12已经过去一大半了，算了我还是明年再剁手吧！弱弱的问下，大家都剁了什么

20. After a good night's sleep, I realized that the Double 12 shopping event has already passed by half. Well, I might as well wait until next year to splurge! Shyly asking, what did everyone else buy?

21. 当失恋时要鼓励自己，前方会有一个爱你的人在等着你。

21. When you are heartbroken, encourage yourself, for there will be someone who loves you waiting for you ahead.

22. 人家有的是背景儿 我有的只是背影儿。

22. Others have backgrounds, while all I have is a silhouette.

23. 37每洗一次头就掉很多头发，我都隔三天洗一次今天洗了两遍掉的很夸张，吹头发就没怎么掉了，可能隔三天太久。

23. I lose a lot of hair every time I wash my hair. I wash it every three days, but today I washed it twice and the amount of hair falling out was exaggerated. There was hardly any hair loss when I blow-dried my hair, which might suggest that waiting three days is too long.

24. 6曾经的青春，曾经的故事，都随着年龄的增长，变成了记忆最深处的柔软和炽热，那些年，哭过笑过一起陪伴过，最简单的，也是最珍贵的。

24. 6 The youth of yesteryears, the stories of the past, all become the softest and warmest memories as we grow older. Those years, when we cried, laughed, and accompanied each other, are the simplest yet most precious.

25. 22我已经养成了掉头发和四点到五点起床的习惯了我很好，加油

25. 22 I've developed the habit of shedding hair and waking up between 4 and 5 PM. I'm doing well, keep up the good work!

26. 25年纪大了特别脆弱，遇到个什么不顺心就背后哭一鼻子。病了后更是矫情，怕疼怕见血，扎指头、打吊瓶儿都得指定用儿童针。

26. At the age of 25, people are particularly fragile and, upon encountering any misfortune, they would cry behind their backs. After falling ill, they become even more melodramatic, afraid of pain and seeing blood. They have to specifically use children' needles for pricking fingers and administering intravenous injections.

27. 4整夜整夜的失眠，大把大把的掉头发我深陷在一些无谓的阴霾中无法走出来就像在白夜里走路。

27. Suffering from insomnia night after night, shedding handfuls of hair, I am trapped in some meaningless gloom, unable to escape, just like walking in the middle of the day.

28. 对于一个要秃头的人来说，每次洗头都掉这么多头发真的很心痛。

28. It really breaks my heart to lose so much hair every time I wash my hair, for someone who is going bald.

29. 晚上真的是不能想事情一想事情就失眠怪不得最近掉头发掉得多。

29. It's really not good to think about things at night. As soon as I think about things, I can't sleep, and that's why I've been losing a lot of hair lately.

30. 40人如果出卖了自我的尊严，他将永远失去尊严。就是说，让别人作出可耻的行为，不管是迫害还是行赌，这本身就是不光彩的。这样的迫害或者诱惑者，在违反伦理的压力下，不管对方能否保卫自我的尊严和荣誉，他自我已经失去了尊严和荣誉。

30. If 40 people sell their self-respect, they will forever lose their dignity. That is to say, forcing others to commit disgraceful acts, whether through persecution or temptation, is itself dishonorable. Such persecutors or tempters, under the pressure to violate ethics, have already lost their dignity and honor regardless of whether the other party can defend their own dignity and honor.

31. 46恐怖差不多是个病态的感觉，对身体的压力之猛，能够使器官的机能不是发挥到最高度，就是全部瓦解。其实事情很简单，只是一种精神上的触电，出现的方式总是古古怪怪的难以捉摸。

31. 46 Terror is almost a pathological feeling, exerting such immense pressure on the body that it can either bring the organs to their highest level of function or cause them to collapse entirely. In reality, the matter is quite simple; it's just a spiritual shock, and it always appears in peculiar and elusive ways.

32. 14亲爱的自己，心存善良，更要懂自保。友善对待别人，但也不要受别人欺负，不要让你的善良，变成别人伤害自己的工具。你的善良，要有底线、有原则。

32. 14 Dear self, hold kindness in your heart, but also know how to protect yourself. Treat others with kindness, but do not let yourself be bullied. Do not let your kindness become a tool for others to hurt themselves. Your kindness should have its limits and principles.

33. 6在杭州混了快一年，终于混到了点感觉，努力不一定有收获，但是不努力一定不会有收获，加油

33. Having been in Hangzhou for almost a year, I finally have a sense of it. Effort doesn't guarantee success, but without effort, there's definitely no success. Keep up the good work!

34. 33人为什么要长头发，到后来还要为掉发伤心。人为什么要想这个问题，不想不就开心很多吗？

34. Why do 33 people have long hair, and then become sad about hair loss? Why do they think about this question? Isn't it much happier not to think about it?

35. 55友谊是我人哀伤时的缓和剂，激情的舒解剂，是咱们的压力的流泄口，咱们灾难时的庇护所，是咱们犹疑时的商议者，是咱们脑子的清新剂，咱们思想的散发口，也是咱们沉思的锻炬和改善。

35. 55 Friendship is a mitigator of my sadness, a reliever of my passions, an outlet for our pressures, a shelter in our disasters, a consultant in our doubts, a freshener for our minds, a vent for our thoughts, and also a forger and an improver of our contemplation.

36. 扎了一天的马尾，随手梳几下就掉这么多头发，我怕是要秃了吧。

36. Having worn a ponytail all day, just a few strokes and so much hair falls out. I'm afraid I'm going to go bald.