——一笑解千愁，尽在爆笑王！

—— A smile can dispel a thousand worries, all in the laughter king!

1. 是的，一切都是正确的，可见他的数学能力之强。

Yes, everything is correct, which demonstrates his strong mathematical abilities.

2. 王尼玛郑重告诫:开车不要喝酒，开车不要骑女生。

2. Wang Nimama solemnly warns: Do not drink and drive, do not ride a girl while driving.

3. 我说了，完了就完了！

3. I said, that's it, it's over!

4. 桃子今天不能说话。他喉咙里有个痔疮，刚做了手术切除了，但是已经不能说话了。让我们为他默哀。

4. Today, Peach cannot speak. He has a hemorrhoid in his throat, which has just been surgically removed. However, he is unable to talk anymore. Let's mourn for him in silence.

5. 不要在意这些细节。

5. Don't mind these details.

6. 电话正在为你接通。请按住伤口，尽量保持在心脏水平以上。等等我们。我们都用敷衍干净，洗的更健康。

6. The phone is being connected for you. Please hold the wound and try to keep it above the level of the heart. Wait for us. We all clean off the rough edges, making it healthier to wash.

7. 你不要问他愿不愿意赴汤蹈火，当你遇到困难的时候，你只要问:如果我的哥们儿它被切断了，你会哥们儿把它给我？

7. You don't need to ask if he is willing to go through fire and water. When you encounter difficulties, just ask: If my buddy's line gets cut off, would you give me your buddy's line?

8. 有网友问，从香港带两罐以上奶粉回内地算走私吗，从内地带两罐奶粉回香港算贩毒吗？

8. An internet user asked, "Is it considered smuggling to bring back two or more cans of formula milk from Hong Kong to the mainland, and is it regarded as drug trafficking to bring back two cans of formula milk from the mainland to Hong Kong?"

9. 嘿嘿这牛b坏了。

9. Hey, this牛逼 is broken. (The phrase "牛逼" is a slang in Chinese, meaning "awesome" or "cool," but it can be translated as "牛逼" for its literal meaning which is an onomatopoeic expression to describe something that is awesome or impressive. However, "Hey, this牛逼 is broken" is not a common phrase, and it might be a casual or humorous way of saying that something that was impressive or functioning well has now broken down.)

10. 从那时起，他们过着幸福的生活，没有羞耻和鲁莽。

10. Since then, they have lived a happy life, without shame and recklessness.

11. 他们每天都报道不完自己国家强奸的新闻，甚至把版面留给李天一，可见印度人对欣赏对方的好感。

11. They have an endless stream of rape news from their own country every day, and even leave space for Li Tianyi, which shows the Indians' fondness for appreciating each other.

12. 开心的去嫖，醒来就成了老婆，绿帽子层层叠叠。

12. Go for a happy嫖 and wake up to find yourself married; the green hat is layered upon layered.

13. 何润东立刻被网友定义为猪一样的队友。

13. Hot Dong He was immediately labeled by netizens as a "pig-like teammate."

14. 哈，那棵树是哪个混蛋种的？

14. Ha, which bastard planted that tree?

15. 大部分男主角都失禁了，他们求饶:杨很快收到了神奇的力量，哦，亲爱的。其中，尔康最为凶猛。Ahhh

15. Most of the male characters have lost control of their bladders, and they beg for mercy: Yang quickly received神奇的力量，oh, dear. Among them, Er Kong was the most fierce. Ahhh

16. 唉！恶心是恶心，但不会影响水质。就像一个妓女——女人告诉她的客人，我很脏，但是不会有性病！

16. Alas! Nausea is nausea, but it won't affect the water quality. Just like a prostitute—the woman tells her clients, I'm dirty, but I won't give you any STDs!

17. 也许这只是一个深情的汉堡。因为爱，怎么会有沧桑，所以一切都是年轻的。

17. Maybe it's just a passionate hamburger. Because of love, how can there be weariness, so everything is youthful.

18. 买了一个可乐送金鱼，里面既有糖又有蛋白质。营养均衡合理。一瓶值五瓶。文女士十分感动，随后报警。

18. I bought a bottle of cola with a goldfish included, which contained both sugar and protein. The nutrition is balanced and reasonable. One bottle is worth five bottles. Ms. Wen was deeply moved and subsequently reported it to the police.

19. 世界上最遥远的距离不是生与死，而是我在门内，我的蛋在门外。

19. The farthest distance in the world is not between life and death, but me being inside the door and my egg being outside.

20. 在此郑重提醒各位女同学，玩鸡蛋就完蛋了。你没有卵子，也不知道有多痛苦！

20. I solemnly remind all the female students here, playing around with eggs will be the end of you. You don't have eggs, and you don't know how painful it is!

21. 校长想让谁怀孕谁就能怀孕！

21. The principal wants anyone to get pregnant and they will!

22. 高空抛物体是不良行为，高空抛屎更是罪大恶极。

22. Throwing objects from high places is bad behavior, and throwing feces from high places is even worse.

23. 两只无辜的小狗，在草地上相遇，遇见那个恨晚，刚见面几秒，马上就开始做丢人的事。

23. Two innocent puppies meet on the grass, encounter that latecomer, and as soon as they meet, they start doing something embarrassing right away.

24. 操，操，操，这让你害怕。

24. Shit, shit, shit, this is scary.

25. 女人结婚后，就得嫁给男方的兄弟。这不是捆绑销售吗？

25. After a woman gets married, she has to marry the brother of her husband. Isn't this a bundled sale?

26. 感谢微软为世界和平做出的巨大贡献，及时阻止了第三次世界大战的爆发！

26. Thank you, Microsoft, for your tremendous contribution to world peace, for timely preventing the outbreak of the Third World War!

27. 你的名字有多火多长？我叫肛门！

27. How popular and long is your name? My name is Anus!

28. 这片森林很大，所有的朋友都有爱。

28. The forest is vast, and all the friends have love.

29. 那我去的话，估计会被当场处决。

29. If I were to go, I'm afraid I would be executed on the spot.

30. 为了报复老婆，沫沫压了丈母娘动物！你是一个大胆的艺术家！

30. In order to get revenge on his wife, Mo Mo oppressed his mother-in-law's animal! You are a bold artist!

31. 我觉得这才是真爱。我能想到最浪漫的事就是和你在电梯里拉屎。

31. I think this is the truest love. The most romantic thing I can think of is having a bowel movement with you in the elevator.

32. 脱鞋，很容易滑倒。

32. Take off your shoes, it's very easy to slip and fall.

33. 我告诉过你多少次了，孩子们不应该看暴力节目？

33. How many times have I told you that children shouldn't watch violent programs?

34. 24岁的吉·谢斯凯尔斯，现在米歇尔·普拉蒂尼都认不出她了。以前是黑木耳，现在是狗吃的黑。

34. Ji Xiesikeers, who is now 24 years old, is unrecognizable even to Michel Platini. She used to be a black pearl, but now she's black as the dog's meal.

35. 荆轲用肩膀上两条毛茸茸的腿刺向秦王。

35. Jing Ke used two furry legs on his shoulders to stab at the King of Qin.