又可爱又沙雕的签（又可爱又沙雕的句子，又可爱又沙雕的朋友），在某个阳光明媚的午后，悄然绽放。

A cute and absurd sign (a cute and absurd sentence, a cute and absurd friend) quietly blossoms on a sunny afternoon.

1. 你累了吗？打开朋友圈看到我，一个你得不到的女人。

1. Are you tired? Open your朋友圈 and see me, a woman you can't have.

2. 今天有点烦。不知道怎么形容。我暂且称之为公主的烦恼。

2. I'm a bit annoyed today. I don't know how to describe it. Let me call it the princess's烦恼 for now.

3. 对自己好一点。能怪男朋友就别怪自己了。

3. Take better care of yourself. Don't blame yourself if you can blame your boyfriend.

4. 人生不仅要吃甜还要吃肉。

4. Life is not only about eating sweet things but also about eating meat.

5. 我是超级动作英雄动态光波波波。

5. I am Super Action Hero Dynamic Light Wave Pop Pop.

6. 运动是一种享受，但我不喜欢运动，因为我不是那种渴望享受的人。

6. Exercise is a pleasure, but I don't like sports because I'm not the type who craves enjoyment.

7. 保持年轻的秘密:谎报年龄。

7. The secret to staying young: lying about your age.

8. 为什么每当我想和林品如谈恋爱的时候，生活总是给我一个洪石仙？

8. Why does life always give me a Hong Shixian whenever I want to fall in love with Lin Pinru?

9. 一起去游览宇宙吧，我数数星星，你笨一点就数月亮好了。

9. Let's explore the universe together. I'll count the stars, and if you're a bit slow, just count the moons.

10. 上帝给了我很多变胖的机会，我抓住了。

10. God has given me many opportunities to gain weight, and I have seized them.

11. 我们和魔法童话城堡有信号联系。如果你有重要的事情，请留言。

11. We have a signal connection with the Magic Fairy Tale Castle. If you have anything important, please leave a message.

12. 谈恋爱不要总是钻牛角尖，不然容易变成牛角包。

12. Don't always get caught up in nitpicking when dating, otherwise you might end up being a "horny bun."

13. 一百天不可爱挑战正式开始，今天第一天，挑战失败。

13. The "100 Days Unlovable Challenge" officially begins, today is the first day, and the challenge has failed.

14. 我觉得我很擅长哄男生睡觉。你在吗？他们说他们要睡觉了。

14. I think I'm really good at putting boys to sleep. Are you there? They say they are going to sleep.

15. 让我向你介绍浆果的种类。草莓、小红莓和蓝莓。你想念我的浆果。

15. Let me introduce you to the types of berries. Strawberries, cranberries, and blueberries. Do you miss my berries?

16. 一条女生的裙子，可以撑起所有的温柔和盛夏。

16. A girl's dress can hold all the gentleness and the height of summer.

17. 如果道歉有用，为什么还要支付宝微信？

17. If apologies are effective, why do we still need Alipay and WeChat?

18. 如果我年轻有为，肯定有很多人不自卑。

18. If I were young and talented, I'm sure there would be many people who wouldn't be self-deprecating.

19. 大家好，我是xx的巧克力，乖巧可爱又努力。

19. Hi everyone, I'm the chocolate from xx, I'm cute, clever, and hardworking.

20. 如果我没猜错的话，你在呼吸。

20. If I'm not mistaken, you're breathing.

21. 刷进这个朋友圈的人，三天之内脱不了单，回来找我。让你失望的事情我会给你一个锤子。我不会随便喜欢一个男生。你是第5999个。

21. If you can't find a date within three days of joining this circle of friends, come back to me. I'll give you a hammer for anything that lets you down. I won't just like any boy. You're the 5999th one.

22. 最好的朋友，从来都是钱包，它一瘦我就心疼。

22. The best friend is always the wallet, and I feel sorry for it whenever it gets thinner.

23. 没人送你礼物也没关系。你可以来找我。只要你问，我就说不。

23. It's okay if no one gives you gifts. You can come to me. As long as you ask, I will say no.

24. 我喜欢把冰淇淋放进肚子里的感觉。我上辈子一定是个冰箱。

24. I enjoy the feeling of ice cream in my stomach. I must have been a refrigerator in my previous life.

25. 如果我消失了，你会找我吗，即使只是问李习安的女朋友在哪里？

25. If I disappear, would you look for me, even if it's just to ask where Li Xian's girlfriend is?

26. 银河不如麻辣烫。

26. The Milky Way is not as good as spicy noodles.

27. 没有朋友圈的时候好好生活。

27. Live well when you don't have a circle of friends.

28. 我总是发一个发财，发朋友圈。

28. I always post a "get rich" message on my WeChat Moments.

29. 吃的开心就是零热量。

29. Enjoying the food is zero calories.

30. 月亮和星星会互相担心吗？

30. Do the moon and stars worry about each other?

31. 奶茶喝多了没意思。一天三杯刚刚好。

31. It's not interesting to drink milk tea too much. Three cups a day is just right.

32. 世界上真正可爱的人很少，老子就是其中之一。

32. There are very few truly adorable people in the world, and Laozi is one of them.

33. 如果你一层一层剥开我的心，你会发现，你要坐牢了。

33. If you peel away layer by layer of my heart, you'll find out that you're going to be imprisoned.

34. 我对打我很忠诚。我不能打我的朋友。

34. I am loyal to the person who beats me. I cannot beat my friends.

35. 评论区抽一个人送一套别墅，自己选择抽奖时间。这是我和李习安结婚的日子。

35. I will draw a person from the comment section to give away a villa; you can choose the time for the draw. This is the day when I got married to Li Xian.

36. 如果你喜欢我，你可以告诉我，人的一生都要经历被美女拒绝的感觉。

36. If you like me, you can let me know, everyone in their lifetime will experience the feeling of being rejected by a beautiful woman.

37. 我以前是个可爱的女孩，后来用力过猛把她打死了，我就成了沙雕。

37. I used to be a lovely girl, but I hit her too hard and killed her, and then I became a fool.

38. 我想下辈子做个帅哥，虽然这辈子。

38. I want to be a handsome guy in my next life, although I am one this life.

39. 不笑，笑就脸大。

39. No smile, or a smile makes the face look big.

40. 我不爱和笨蛋玩，但如果是你的话，智商为零也没关系。

40. I don't like to play with傻瓜, but if it's you, even if your IQ is zero, it's fine.

41. 与其无所事事，不如和我一起兴风作浪。

41. It's better to stir up trouble with me than to do nothing.

42. 好看的锁骨也一样，有趣的肚子蹦蹦跳跳。

42. The attractive collarbone as well, the interesting belly wiggles and jumps.

43. 我不敢问你喜欢什么样的女生。恐怕他们我都见过。

43. I dare not ask what kind of girl you like. I'm afraid I've seen them all.

44. 如果你扔硬币，它破了，你今天就没有晚餐了。

44. If you toss the coin and it breaks, you won't have dinner today.

45. 我跟李白说，好喜欢他的诗作，路由气坏了，所以我断网了。

45. I told Li Bai that I really liked his poems, which made the router so angry that I had to disconnect from the internet.

46. 有这么多早起的人。为什么我是最好看的？

46. There are so many early risers. Why am I the most handsome?

47. 我可以要五元钱吗？想买酸奶长高保护你。

47. Can I have five yuan? I want to buy yogurt to help you grow taller and protect you.

48. 我知道你喜欢我，但是我找不到任何证据。

48. I know you like me, but I can't find any evidence.

49. 吃吃喝喝，长生不老，胖胖的，充满希望。

49. Enjoying eating and drinking, eternally youthful, chubby, full of hope.

50. 我饿醒的时候可爱到吃不下。

50. When I wake up hungry, I'm so cute I can't eat.

51. 从此以后，你社会，我富贵，咱们香水不犯花露水。

51. From now on, you have your social status, and I have my wealth and status. We won't overlap, just like perfume and cologne don't clash.