“一键设置微信签名，宝快来试试吧！”

"Set your WeChat signature with one click, try it out, Bao!"

1. 青春期的爱恋就像是精神，不管你有没有吸，身后总站着一群林则徐。

1. The love of adolescence is like opium; whether you take it or not, there is always a group of Lin Zexu standing behind you.

2. 54酒杯一端，政策放宽；筷子一提，可以可以；酒足饭停，不行也行；你醉我醉，不对也对。

2. With a glass of wine in hand, policies are relaxed; with a lift of the chopsticks, it's all good; after a feast, even if you're not feeling it, it's fine; if you're drunk and I'm drunk, it's all right even if it's not.

3. 小时候，我最喜欢玩捉迷藏，等别人藏好了，我就回家吃饭。

3. When I was a child, my favorite game was hide and seek. I would go home to eat while others were hiding.

4. 19你若军训，便是晴天。你若放假，便是雨天。你若发奋写作业，便是开学前一天!

4. If you're on military training, it's a sunny day. If you're on vacation, it's a rainy day. If you're striving to finish your homework, it's the day before school starts!

5. 44麻雀妈妈问小麻雀“宝宝，你今天扎什么头发？”小麻雀说“啾啾”妈妈答道：“啾啾就啾啾”

5. The sparrow mother asked the little sparrow, "Baby, what hairstyle are you wearing today?" The little sparrow said, "Chiu-chiu." The mother replied, "Chiu-chiu, that's chiu-chiu."

6. 此处不留爷，自有留爷处。处处不留爷，爷回家做家务。

6. If there's no place for me here, there's surely another place for me. If there's no place for me everywhere, I'll go back home and take care of the household chores.

7. 52看起来像水，闻起来陶醉。喝进去辣嘴，留肚里闹鬼。走路来绊腿，半夜想找水。醒来就后悔，身心俱疲惫。

7. 52 looks like water, smells intoxicating. It burns the mouth when drunk, and haunts the stomach like a ghost. It trips the legs when walking, and at midnight, one craves for water. Upon waking, one regrets it, feeling both physically and mentally exhausted.

8. 28以后我的吉祥物决定就是你了，螃蟹！——因为，你有钱（钳）

8. After the 28th, my mascot has been decided to be you, the crab! — Because, you have money (claws)!

9. 53劝酒者起身敬酒，被劝者会说：“屁股一抬，喝了重来”，意让劝酒者再喝一个，此时劝酒者应对：“屁股一动，表示尊重”。

9. The person urging to drink stands up to pour a drink, and the one being urged will say, "With a lift of the buttocks, drink and start over," meaning to ask the person urging to drink another one. At this point, the person urging should respond, "A move of the buttocks shows respect."

10. 42今天去学校 老师问我书在哪里 对呀 我输在哪。

10. 42 Today I went to school, and the teacher asked me where the book was. "Yes," I thought, "Where did I lose it?"

11. 幸福无需太繁杂，平凡中携点欢乐就行。

11. Happiness does not require too much complexity; being content with the ordinary is enough.

12. 听说睡觉放枕头旁边会有辐射，吓得我赶紧起来把枕头扔了，吓死宝宝了。

12. I heard that sleeping with a pillow next to you can emit radiation, so I got up quickly and threw the pillow away, scared the bejesus out of me.

13. 生活的本义为快乐，接纳所有事与愿违。

13. The original meaning of life is to be happy, to embrace all things and to be benevolent.

14. 36有一天我在打王 者 下路一直死一直死 我跟队友说防下路防下路 防下啊防下啊 你听见了吗 放下啊。

14. 36 One day, while playing King of Glory in the bottom lane and dying repeatedly, I kept telling my teammates, "Defend the bottom lane, defend the bottom lane, defend the bottom, defend the bottom. Did you hear me? Defend the bottom!"

15. 因为年轻的时候，我们常常冲着镜子做鬼脸;年老的时候，镜子总会扯平的!

15. Because when we are young, we often make funny faces in front of the mirror; when we get old, the mirror will always even things out!

16. 51法海永远都当不了rapper，因为他不会饶蛇。

16. 51 Fa Hai will never be able to be a rapper because he doesn't know how to twist his tongue.

17. 32为什么阿姨从不流汗，因为阿姨怕留下姨汗。

17. Why does Aunt never sweat? Because Aunt is afraid of leaving "aunt sweat."

18. 打开设置，进入设置主页面之后，点击『应用』进入。

18. Open the Settings, after entering the main Settings page, click on 'Apps' to proceed.

19. 23我告诉风说向西刮风 风嘟嘟嘴说“你才像西瓜”。

19. 23 I told the wind to blow westward, and the wind pouted, saying, "You're more like a watermelon."

20. 10求晴天，求高温，求四十度求，暴晒求，没风，我们苦点没关系，一定要让高一的学弟学妹们，有个良好的军训环境。

20. We pray for sunny weather, high temperatures, temperatures reaching forty degrees, full sun exposure, and no wind. We don't mind being a bit uncomfortable, but we must ensure that the freshmen, our junior and senior brothers and sisters, have a good military training environment.

21. 16麻雀妈妈闻小麻雀：“宝贝今天想扎一个什么发型呀？”小麻雀：“啾啾～”

21. The sparrow mother asked the young sparrow: "Dear, what hairstyle do you want to try today?" The young sparrow: "Chu chu~"

22. 网络不稳定时，软件会出现加载慢等现象，请更换良好的网络尝试。

22. When the network is unstable, the software may experience slow loading and other phenomena. Please try using a stable network.

23. 你有没有觉得你很矮，那就左脚踩右脚看看有没有高点

23. Do you feel you're short? Try stepping on your left foot with your right to see if there's a higher point.

24. 热爱未曾降温，时光与我皆在前行。

24. My beloved has never diminished, for the sunlight and I are in front.

25. 不要怕女人物质，不物质的女人更可怕，因为她要的是真爱，这玩意稀有到你给不起。

25. Do not fear a woman's materialism, for a non-material woman is even more terrifying, because what she seeks is true love, which is so rare that you cannot provide it.

26. 46问:你每天吃那么多真的想瘦吗？答:享受啊！

26. Question 46: Do you really want to lose weight by eating so much every day? Answer: Enjoyment!

27. 人生不能像做菜，把所有的料都准备好才下锅。

27. Life cannot be like cooking a dish, where all the ingredients are prepared before being put into the pot.

28. 如果你是我的菜，对不起，最近我不想吃菜。况且，你并不是我的菜。

28. If you're my type, sorry, I don't feel like eating vegetables lately. Besides, you're not my type.

29. 10现在的男孩子可真有意思，和一个女生看**就发说说炫耀，我和五十几个女生一起上课，我说什么了吗？

29. 10 Now boys are really interesting, they boast about seeing a girl in a post, but what did I say? I took classes with over fifty girls, did I say anything?

30. 男朋友生气要怎么哄生更大的气，让他来哄你。

30. How to pacify a boyfriend who is angry so that he gets even angrier and makes him come and pacify you.

31. 17有天，小熊买了个冰淇淋，骄阳似火，冰淇淋化了，掉在了地上，小熊说：“好像泥呀，好像泥呀。”你听见了吗，好想你呀。

31. On the 17th day, the little bear bought an ice cream. The sun was blazing, and the ice cream melted, falling to the ground. The little bear said, "It's like mud, it's like mud." Did you hear that? I miss you so much.

32. 60“你买的什么书？”“编程。”“c++还是java”“沈从文”

32. 60 "What kind of book did you buy?" "Programming." "C++ or Java?" "Shen Congwen."

33. 5有一个菠萝去理发，他坐了很久理发师一直不给他理发，它就说：“你理理我吧”（生气哄对象眼）

33.5 There was a pineapple going to get a haircut, and it sat for a long time while the barber did not cut its hair. Feeling impatient, it said, "Cut my hair already" (with an angry, yet teasing tone).

34. 20学校给晒太阳取了个很好听的名字叫做军训。

34. The school gave the activity of sunbathing a very nice name called military training.

35. 46今日酒，今日醉，不要活的太疲惫；好也过，歹也过，只求心情还不错。

35. Today's wine, today's drunkenness, don't live too tired; whether it's good or bad, just hope the mood is still quite good.

36. 生活张弛有度，方能有更多绚烂。

36. Living a life of Zhang Yibai is moderate, and one's capabilities have more endurance.

37. 1酒伴的是孤独，是寂寞。醉后才发现，只是少了身边的那个人。

37.1 The companion of wine is loneliness and solitude. It is only after getting drunk that one realizes that it is just the absence of that person beside them.

38. 结婚九块。离婚十二块。傻子才离婚呢。那么贵

38. Wedding costs 9 blocks. Divorce costs 12 blocks. What a fool to get a divorce; it's so expensive.

39. 50今天下了好大的雨啊，朋友问我要不要伞，我说不要伞 不要伞你听到了吗不要散 不要散。

39. 50 It rained so heavily today, a friend asked if I needed an umbrella, and I said, "No umbrella, no umbrella. Did you hear me? Don't scatter, don't scatter."

40. 18心碎喝酒，喝酒伤肺，到头来没心又没肺。

40. Breaking one's heart through drinking, drinking damages the lungs, in the end, one has neither heart nor lungs.

41. 点击已允许，就可以看到微信的悬浮窗已经打开了。

41. Click on the allowed button, and you will see that the WeChat floating window has been opened.

42. 31女孩子要稍微做点坏事 然后老天一生气 就给你发个小伙。

42. 31 girls should do a bit of mischief, and then when heaven gets angry, it sends you a young man.

43. 只想找一个在我失意时可以承受我的眼泪，在我快乐时，可以让我咬一口的肩膊。

43. Just want to find an arm that can bear my tears when I am disappointed and let me bite into it when I am happy.

44. 1小心点啊同学们，我这个人轻易不出手，出手必伤人，伤人必见血，见血必死人!

44. 1 Be careful, everyone. I don't make light of my actions, and when I strike, I hurt, and when I hurt, I make someone bleed, and when I make someone bleed, they die!

45. 34煎蛋给荷包蛋表白唱的歌 “这是一首煎蛋的小情歌～”

45. The song "Fried Egg Confesses" for the omelette: "This is a little love song for fried eggs ~"

46. 2022女生微信的幽默个性签名说说大全合集三篇（

46. A Collection of Three Humorous and Personality Signature Sayings for Girls' WeChat in 2022

47. （手机型号：一加11，软件及版本号：微信8031）

47. (Phone Model: OnePlus 11, Software and Version Number: WeChat 8031)

48. 15低头思故乡——你们都想家了吧!赶紧给我把头抬起来，好好望望太阳!!!

48. Bow your head and think of home — do you all miss home now? Quick, lift your heads up and take a good look at the sun!!!

49. 33不会喝酒，前途没有，只和饮料，提拔难料

49. 33 doesn't drink alcohol, has no prospects, only drinks beverages, promotion is unpredictable.

50. 我用一麻袋的钱上大学，换了一麻袋书；毕业了，用这些书换钱，却买不起一个麻袋！

50. I went to college with a sack of money, trading it for a sack of books; upon graduation, I used these books to make money, but couldn't afford a sack anymore!

51. 6教官：你们有没有MP，有的给我听，没有的睡觉。

51. 6 Instructor: Do you have a radio, those who do, listen up, those who don't, go to sleep.

52. 4皇上微服私访回来，皇太后见面就问“吾儿此游累么？”皇上大惊道“mymy name is lilei？”

52. After the Emperor returned from his secret visit in disguise, the Empress Dowager asked upon seeing him, "My son, are you tired from this trip?" The Emperor was greatly startled and exclaimed, "Mymy, my name is Li Lei?"

53. 17我就是一放猪的孩子，整天把你们赶过来又赶过去(OHMYGOD!原来大家都是PIG)

53. 17 I am just a child who herds pigs, driving you back and forth all day long (OHMYGOD! It turns out everyone is a pig).

54. 14军训前一定要拍照现在的模样，因为军训后肯定你认不出自己。

54. Be sure to take a photo of your current appearance before military training, because after the training, you will definitely not recognize yourself.

55. 21我从不是你喝醉酒时喊出的名字，我只是那个站在岁月尖头陪你成长的女子。

55. 21 I have never been the name you shouted when drunk; I am just the woman standing at the tip of the years, growing with you.

56. 8有蚊子在某女生面前飞，女生微躲了一下，教官见到说：不许动!等它咬到你再动!

56. A mosquito was flying in front of a female student, and she slightly dodged. The instructor saw this and said: Don't move! Wait until it bites you before you move!

57. 在月黑风高的夜晚，睡不着只好到你的家里拜访你

57. On a dark and windy night, unable to sleep, I had no choice but to visit you at your home.

58. 23酒逢知已千杯少，能喝多少喝多少，喝不了就赶紧跑。

58. When wine meets a friend, a thousand cups are never enough; drink as much as you can, and if you can't drink more, run away quickly.

59. 你要吃饱，要早睡，不要仗着自己长得丑就可以任意熬夜。

59. Make sure you eat well, get to bed early, and don't take advantage of your unattractive appearance to stay up late随意熬夜.

60. 19百川到东海，何时再干杯，此刻不喝酒，将来徒伤悲。

60. The hundred rivers flow to the East Sea, when shall we raise another cup? Not to drink now will only bring sorrow in the future.

61. 爱上了你这种上瘾的毒药，你叫我怎么舍得离开你

61. Falling in love with this addictive poison, how can I bear to leave you?

62. 1一群女生去上厕所，被教官看到，厉声喝道：上厕所是很严肃的事，给我排成一排去!从厕所里出来要精神抖擞，昂首挺胸!

62. 1 A group of girls went to the bathroom, and they were seen by the instructor, who shouted sternly: Going to the bathroom is a serious matter, line up in a row for me! When you come out of the bathroom, you must be energetic and hold your head high and chest out!

63. 21整天戴AirPods会影响爱情运，因为AirPods没有音源线。

63. Wearing AirPods for 21 consecutive days can affect one's love luck, because AirPods do not have a sound source cable.

64. 如果开启了无障碍内的功能，会增加系统负载导致性能下降。建议进入设置--快捷与辅助--无障碍，及时关闭不需要的功能。

64. If the accessibility features are enabled, it will increase the system load and lead to a decrease in performance. It is recommended to enter Settings > Quick Settings & Accessibility > Accessibility and timely disable the unnecessary features.

65. 48若喝醉酒第一个想起的人，那将是最爱的人。

65. If the first person you think of after getting drunk is the one you love the most.

66. 2公鲨鱼把母鲨鱼迷晕了并且拍了两张照片，到了警察局，警察问他为什么，他委屈的说:“我只是想和她拍两张昏鲨照。”

66. 2 male sharks drugged the female shark and took two photos, then went to the police station. When the police asked him why, he complained: "I just wanted to take two photos of her while she was unconscious."

67. 5我很奇怪为什么空间动态越来越少了，想了很久才明白过来，原来前些天疯刷动态的行星饭去军训了。

67. 5 I'm puzzled why there are fewer dynamic updates in space. I thought about it for a long time before I realized, it turns out that the planet fans who were疯狂刷动态前几天去军训了.

68. 我很喜欢你，你也要多点一样喜欢我，不要小气，拉勾。

68. I really like you, and you should like me a bit more too, don't be stingy, cross your fingers.

69. 53要一杯南瓜杏仁露，不要杏，不要瓜，不要露，要南仁。

69. Order a cup of pumpkin almond milk, no peaches, no melon, no nectar, just the pumpkin and almonds.

70. 你生在这个世上，活着浪费资源，死了浪费土地

70. You are wasting resources by being alive in this world, and you waste land after you die.

71. 6有一天大象吃冰淇淋，吃了好多，越吃越想吐。然后老鼠就说“象腻了象腻了”

71.6 One day, the elephant was eating ice cream, and it ate a lot. The more it ate, the more it wanted to vomit. Then the mouse said, "Elephant, you're tired of it, elephant, you're tired of it."

72. 风吹哪页读哪页，哪页艰涩撕哪页。

72. Who reads which page, which page is torn, which page is worn.

73. 和你们在一起真是愁白了我的少年头啊 !

73. Being with you has truly turned my youth into worry lines!

74. 可能我就是一个烂人，但是这一辈子你在不会遇见第二个我

74. Maybe I am a scoundrel, but in this lifetime, you will never meet another like me.

75. 如果有来生，我一定要成为神经，因为我走了你就得。

75. If there is a next life, I must become a nerve because if I leave, you will have to.

76. 宁愿在雨天里淋雨军训，也不接受太阳公公的礼物。

76. Would rather be drenched in the rain during military training than accept the gift from the sun.

77. 11眼睛别乱看，看我就行，这么帅的大帅哥站在你们面前都不知道看，一帮傻孩子!

77. 11 Don't look around so recklessly, just look at me, you handsome guy standing in front of you, you don't even know to look at, a bunch of傻 kids!

78. 18让太阳来得更猛烈一些吧……军训很精彩!

78. 18 Let the sun shine even more fiercely... The military training is very exciting!

79. 35我在家闲得长出了蘑菇，我把蘑菇煮了吃掉，中毒了，去了医院，医生说我中的是好菇毒。

79. 35 I was so bored at home that I grew mushrooms. I cooked and ate the mushrooms, and then I poisoned myself. I went to the hospital, and the doctor said I had ingested a good mushroom poison.

80. 无需事事皆具意义， 生活中的诸多瞬间，皆是细微的美妙。

80. There is no need for special interests; in life, the vast majority of fleeting moments are subtle beauties.

81. 4教官对一学生：过来! 学生笑着走去，教官说道：你这样笑嘻嘻地过来，我他妈的真的很他妈的不知所措!

81. An instructor to a student: Come here! The student smiles and walks over, and the instructor says: You coming over like that, grinning like that, I'm really f*cking at a loss!

82. 想死，买了瓶农药，盖子上写着----再来一瓶。

82. Wanted to die, bought a bottle of pesticide, and the cap said ---- Get another bottle.

83. 17你不醉，我不醉，马路牙子谁来睡？感情深，一口闷，感情浅，舔一舔。酒是粮食做，不喝是罪过。

83. If you're not drunk, I won't be either, who will sleep on the roadside curb? The deeper the affection, the more we drink; the shallower the affection, just a little sip. Wine is made from grain, not drinking is a sin.

84. 请备份好手机数据后，进入设置--系统管理--备份与重置，点击"还原所有设置"尝试，必要时可选择"清除所有数据"，对手机进行重置后再尝试，操作时请提前备份手机数据。

84. Please back up your phone data first, then go to Settings > System Management > Backup & Reset, click "Restore All Settings" to try it. If necessary, you can choose "Erase All Data" and reset the phone before trying again. Remember to back up your phone data in advance during the operation.

85. 语文考完了，我哭了，数学考完了，我发现我哭早了。

85. The Chinese exam is over, and I cried. Then the math exam finished, and I realized I cried too soon.

86. 人生有时就像电脑，说死机就死机了，没得商量。

86. Sometimes life is like a computer, it just crashes when it wants to, and there's no negotiating about it.

87. 59有一天 小鸭在看书 鸭妈妈说吃饭啦 把书合好呀 合好呀 和好呀 你听见了吗 和好呀。

87. 59 One day, the little duck was reading a book when Duck Mother said, "It's time for dinner, put the book away, put it away, make it all right. Did you hear me? Make it all right."