1. 41想聚焦有共同爱好的人想发扬自己的理念来建立社团吧!

1. 41 wants to focus on people with common hobbies and wants to promote their own ideas to establish a club!

2. 楼主：该死的理发店把我头剪坏了!大家出点损招，要求破坏性越大越好，动静越小越好，因为是我一个人去。

2. Poster: The hell of a haircut shop messed up my hair! Everyone come up with some cunning tricks, the more destructive the better, the less noise the better, because I went there alone.

3. 那天我开车时测速电子眼闪了我一下，但我绝对没有超速，于是我倒回去以更慢的速度经过那个电子眼，它又闪了。我很疑惑，又试了一次，它果然又闪了，我觉得好玩，我就以龟速又试了一次。后来我收到5张罚单，因为没有系安全带。。。

3. That day, when I was driving, the speed camera flashed me, but I was absolutely not speeding. So, I went back to pass by the speed camera at a slower speed, and it flashed again. I was puzzled, so I tried it again, and it flashed again. I found it amusing, so I tried it again at a snail's pace. Later, I received 5 traffic tickets because I was not wearing my seatbelt...

4. 你艰苦朴素，端庄大方，从不爱出风头。你行侠仗义，为民除害，从来任劳任怨。你是大家的朋友，更是农民兄弟的朋友，你若改改想吃天鹅肉的妄想，简直完美无缺！

4. You lead a modest and simple life, dignified and generous, never seeking to stand out. You fight for justice and rid the people of harm, always working tirelessly and without complaint. You are a friend to everyone, but especially to the farmers' brothers. If you could let go of your whimsical desire to eat swan meat, you would be perfect!

5. 哈哈偷看者根据共和国特别刑法判处你快乐武器徒刑，剥夺郁闷终生，且没收寂寞烦恼，本判决未终审判决，你无权上诉，即时生笑！

5. The sneak peeker, according to the Special Criminal Law of the Republic, sentences you to the penalty of the Happy Weapon,剥夺 your life of melancholy, and confiscate your loneliness and worries. This judgment is not a final judgment, and you have no right to appeal. Instant laughter!

6. 50条全新口误现已降临地球！——暴笑口误2007酷热版 （ZT）

6. 50 brand new slips of the tongue have now descended upon Earth! —— Hilarious Slip-Ups 2007 Hot Version (Reposted)

7. 2用团结友谊之情帮助所有同学,让我们的学校更美好。

7.2 Help all our classmates with the spirit of unity and friendship, making our school a better place.

8. 曾经在初中。一次自习。在那静谧而祥和的教室里，突然后面传来“噗！”地一声屁响，群众纷纷回头，一个姐们奔放地迎接着众人的注视，说：我放的！然后大家转过去了。两分钟后，后面再次传来一声音色类似的“噗！”，群众都直接回头望向那姐们，姐们慈祥地看着大家，赞许地点了点头，说：你们猜对了。

8. In junior high school, during a self-study session. In that tranquil and harmonious classroom, suddenly a loud "Pff!"屁声从后面传来,大家纷纷回头,一个姐妹大胆地迎接众人的目光，说：“是我放的！”然后大家都转过去了。 Two minutes later, another sound similar to "Pff!" came from behind, and everyone turned directly back to look at that sister. The sister looked kindly at everyone, nodded with approval, and said, "You guessed it."

9. 我是物流部的，过了年，客户打电话过来查询节前的货物什么时候到，因为过节这几天浑浑噩噩的，我也搞不清楚订单的内容，就顺口问了一句：您是什么东西？

9. I am from the logistics department. After the New Year, a customer called to inquire about when the goods before the holiday would arrive. Because I was confused and disoriented during the holiday, I wasn't clear about the content of the order, so I casually asked: What kind of goods are you referring to?

10. 4你很细心,工作总结愿意加入秘书部,为会员资料整理出一份力吗

10.4 You are very meticulous. Would you be willing to join the Secretariat and put in some effort to organize the member information?

11. 1咱们“想同学之所想,急同学只所急”本着全心全意为同学服务的宗旨给大家献上咱们是微薄之力,用爱感动校园。

11. 1 We, with the spirit of "thinking what our classmates think, and being anxious about what our classmates are anxious about," wholeheartedly serve our classmates and offer our meager contributions. Let's move the campus with love.

12. 高中的时候打篮球，A得球后，无私的传给了B，B轻松进球．过了一会，B得球，A大声喊着把球传给他．B却自己把球投出．结果A大怒喊到：刚才真是瞎了我的狗眼……

12. In high school, when playing basketball, after A got the ball, he generously passed it to B, who scored easily. A then shouted loudly to pass the ball back to him, but B decided to shoot himself. The result was that A was so angry he exclaimed, "Just now, my dog's eyes were so blind..."

13. 整好宿舍卫生，造福农民群众

13. Clean up the dormitory, benefiting the rural masses.

14. 7手拉手参与社团文化,心连心构建和谐校园。

14. Participate in the club culture hand in hand, and build a harmonious campus with hearts connected.

15. 苍蝇一家在津津有味地吃饭，小苍蝇问妈妈：“妈妈，我们怎么每天只吃粪？”

15. The fly family is enjoying their meal, and the little fly asks its mother, "Mom, why do we only eat dung every day?"

16. 29生活的真谛就是站在浪尖上欣赏最美的风景。来自生活部的我们将用无微不至的工作态度为你铺一条舒适的生活知道。

16. The essence of life is to stand on the crest of the wave and appreciate the most beautiful scenery. From the Life Department, we will lay out a comfortable path for you with our meticulous work attitude.

17. 老同学聚会，一兄弟酒醉。这时同学问：几点了？酒醉的兄弟从口袋里拿出了一串钥匙看了一眼，然后从容的说：9点40。

17. At a high school reunion, one brother was drunk. At this moment, a classmate asked, "What time is it?" The drunk brother took out a set of keys from his pocket, glanced at it, and calmly said, "9:40."

18. 去买糕点，本来想说“来两个黄梨派加一个蛋塔”，结果说成了“来两个黄鹂鸣蛋塔”

18. I went to buy pastries and originally wanted to say "Give me two pineapple tarts and one egg tart," but ended up saying "Give me two oriole eggs tarts."

19. 他把借条拿出来笑着说：白纸黑字明明白白地写着你欠我100万！难道你想赖帐？！

19. He took out the IOU and said with a laugh: It's all written out in black and white, clearly stating that you owe me one million yuan! Do you want to shirk your debt?!

20. 9在万众瞩目的舞台上,在汇聚期待的灯光里,我们点燃x,我们沸腾青春,铸就你我惊世的璀璨。

20. On the stage under the spotlight of universal attention, in the glow of aggregated expectations, we ignite X, we stir the fire of youth, and forge the dazzling brilliance that astonishes the world, for you and me.

21. 几年后，A又独自在家看电视，敲门声再次响起。

21. Several years later, A was alone at home watching TV when the doorbell rang again.

22. 这两只龙虾是我的宠物，我是带它们出来散步！

22. These two lobsters are my pets, and I am taking them out for a walk!

23. 小青很感兴趣：是什么样的问题？你能不能举一些例子给我看？

23. Xiao Qing was very interested: What kind of questions are they? Can you give me some examples to look at?

24. 大灰狼很无奈 好吧。。。那。。。你是不是长颈鹿啊

24. The big gray wolf is very无奈. Okay... so... are you a giraffe?

25. 只听电话那边咆哮：“错啦！错啦！！不是一斤，不是一斤，是一两！！！”

25. Only heard the roar from the other end of the phone: "Wrong! Wrong!!! Not one jin, not one jin, it's one liang!!!"

26. 答辩的老师问：为什么凤凰要用红色而不是其它颜色

26. The teacher in the debate asked: Why does the phoenix use red instead of other colors?

27. kfc苏丹红事件过后，我去kfc ,服务员问，您要点什么？ 我想都没想：一对苏丹红 服务员马上一副被噎住的表情

27. After the KFC Sudan Red incident, when I went to KFC, the server asked, "What would you like?" Without even thinking, I replied: a pair of Sudan Red. The server immediately had an expression of being choked.

28. 侍者：“或者一个望远镜？”小明生气地拒绝了。

28. Waiter: "Or a telescope?" Xiao Ming refused angrily.

29. 曹操：“哈哈哈哈，大家听到了吗？终于有水喝啦”

29. Cao Cao: "Hahaha, have you all heard? At last, we have water to drink!"

30. 卫生整治，从我做起。

30. Sanitation cleanup, start with me.

31. 环境关联你我他，齐抓共管靠大家。

31. The environment concerns us all; joint efforts and management depend on everyone's participation.

32. 24来吧,朋友!让我们一起插上文学的翅膀,让我们一起挥洒青春的热情,让青春激越的我们一起翱游于文学的海洋吧!

32. Come, my friend! Let's take flight with the wings of literature, let's pour our youthful passion, and let's soar together through the ocean of literature, where our youthful spirits surge!

33. 32在万众瞩目的舞台上,在汇聚期盼的灯光里,我们点燃激情,我们沸腾青春,铸就你我惊世的璀璨。

33. On the stage under the spotlight of widespread attention, in the glow of collective expectations, we ignite passion, we boil over with youth, and forge a dazzling brilliance that astonishes the world for you and me.

34. 那天我说女朋友笨的跟猪一样，她就拧我，特疼，一直不松手，我一急，说：“我告你妈你虐待猪！”

34. That day, when I said my girlfriend was as stupid as a pig, she twisted my arm, it hurt so much, and she wouldn't let go. In a hurry, I said, "I'll tell your mom you're torturing a pig!"

35. 法国人拿来鸡尾酒，冲着老鼠一通猛灌，喝的老鼠步法皆乱，两眼发

35. The Frenchman brought out a cocktail and poured it all over the mouse, causing the mouse to stumble around and its eyes to bulge.

36. 9如果你热爱青春,希望展示自己,那就加入xxx。

36. 9 If you love youth and hope to showcase yourself, join xxx.

37. 蛾子如果到了青蛙和蟾蜍那里，不就成了点心了吗．．．

37. If the caterpillar goes to the frogs and toads, wouldn't it become a snack...

38. 牙一咬，跨步上前，大声问那位mm：同学，请问你是女的吗？

38. With a bite on the teeth, stepping forward, he asked the MM loudly: "Classmate, are you a girl?"

39. 举起两根手指，对同学们说：“同学们，学好数学关键就是三个字！！’多做练习！！’”

39. Raise two fingers and say to the classmates, "Classmates, the key to mastering mathematics is just three words!! 'Do more practice!!' "

40. 4你海阔凭鱼跃,天高任鸟飞,学生会是你展翅翱翔的天空。

40. 4 Like the vast sea where fish leap and the high sky where birds soar, the Student Union will be the sky where you spread your wings and soar.

41. 我同事要问人民币跟日元的汇率，他开口就说，人猿跟日元怎么兑换的。

41. My colleague wants to ask about the exchange rate between the Chinese yuan and the Japanese yen. As soon as he started, he said, "How do you exchange gorillas for Japanese yen?"

42. 忏悔者说：我偷了一个人的脚踏车，而我现在要把它交给你。

42. The penitent says: I stole someone's bicycle, and now I am handing it over to you.

43. 绝望就是中午食堂点了两个菜，吃了第一个我震撼了“世界上还有比这更难吃的菜吗？”吃了第二个我哭了“还真的有啊！

43. Despair is like going to the cafeteria at noon and ordering two dishes; after eating the first one, I was shocked, thinking, "Could there be anything worse tasting in the world?" After eating the second one, I cried, "There really is!"

44. 25海阔凭鱼跃,天高任鸟飞。学生会就是你展翅翱翔的天空

44. "The sea is vast for the fish to leap, the sky is high for the birds to fly. The Student Union is the sky where you spread your wings and soar."

45. 刚交房的时候，来往的人多，每次保安会盘问。

45. When the building was newly handed over, there were many visitors coming and going, and the security guards would interrogate each time.

46. “—%#% 要吃什么！自己去买！！！！

46. "What do you want to eat! Go buy it yourself!!!!!"

47. 2来吧!让我们一起踏上brain-storm的光荣征程!

47. 2 Come on! Let's embark on the glorious journey of brain-storming!

48. 8你能够自由挥洒你的才艺,你能够激扬文字,你能够醉心创作,宣传部是你的舞台。宣传部是一个给你温暖与鼓励的大家庭,期盼同学们的参与!

48. 8 You can freely showcase your talents, you can stir up words, you can immerse yourself in creation, the Publicity Department is your stage. The Publicity Department is a warm and encouraging big family for you, looking forward to the participation of our fellow students!

49. 人人讲卫生，家家树新风

49. Everyone talks about hygiene, every household fosters new trends.

50. 一位70岁的大妈开着一部车载着3个也是大妈级的老人缓缓的开在省道上。交通警察把她拦下来说：“大妈，你开这么慢，会影响交通的。”

50. A 70-year-old elderly woman was driving a car, carrying three other elderly women, all in their 70s, and slowly driving on the provincial highway. A traffic police officer stopped her and said, "Auntie, you're driving so slowly; it will affect traffic."

51. 一直想搭讪，却无胆上前，直到天仙mm即将走入女生楼

51. Always wanted to flirt, but lacked the courage to approach, until the heavenly beauty was about to enter the girls' dormitory.

52. 小明酷爱看侦探剧，从开幕的第一分钟起，就在找寻凶手，不漏过一个可疑的词、一处伏笔。

52. Xiao Ming is an avid fan of detective dramas, and from the first minute of the opening, he is searching for the culprit, not missing a single suspicious word or a hint.

53. 27在此,院学生会为广大有志青年带给了发挥自我才华。挖掘自我才华,挖掘自我潜质的自由天地。热情欢迎大家的加入。

53. Here, the College Student Union offers a free space for all aspiring young people to showcase their talents and tap into their potential. We warmly welcome everyone to join us.

54. 2年轻活力是我的资本,张扬个性凸显胆识是我的超越。

54. 2 Youth and vitality are my capital; showcasing my personality and highlighting my bravery is my transcendence.

55. 外国人：“我叫撒迪尔斯里索斯汤姆迪米特力尔斯凯利安若宝洛斯。。。”

55. Foreigner: "My name is Sadisri Sos Tom Dimitri Skaillian Roubalos..."

56. 小偷很惊奇，想收手准备走，但回头想一想，那来的什么上帝啊，于是又继续偷，这时候又传来了一个声音“上帝已经注意你了”，小偷吓了一跳，环顾四周，发现是一只鹦鹉在说话，于是小偷和鹦鹉攀谈了起来。

56. The thief was surprised and thought of giving up and leaving, but upon second thought, he wondered where this so-called God came from, so he resumed stealing. At this moment, another voice came, "God has noticed you." The thief was startled, looked around, and found a parrot speaking. The thief then began a conversation with the parrot.

57. 29想聚集有共同爱好的人想发扬自己的理念来建立社团吧!

57. 29 Want to gather people with common hobbies and promote your own ideas to establish a club!

58. 摈弃陋习，崇尚文明!

58. Abandon bad habits and promote civilization!

59. 少一件垃圾，多一块净土。

59. Less a piece of trash, more a patch of purity.

60. 积极推进宿舍环境卫生综合整治，营造整洁优美的人居环境。

60. Vigorously promote the comprehensive improvement of dormitory environmental hygiene, creating a clean and beautiful living environment.

61. 53营造温馨舒适的环境,体验别样浪漫的人生。

61. Create a warm and comfortable environment, and experience a different kind of romantic life.

62. 28你海阔凭鱼跃,天高任鸟飞学生会是你展翅翱翔的天空。

62. 28 "As the sea is vast for the fish to leap and the sky is high for the birds to fly, the student union will be the sky where you can spread your wings and soar."

63. 登机后，他随便找了一个靠窗的座位坐了下来，突然来了一个人，对他说：“这是我的座位。”

63. After boarding, he casually chose a window seat and sat down. Suddenly, a person came over and said to him, "This is my seat."