1. 你想念的人已不在服务区，请稍候再想。雷人语录

1. The person you miss is out of service area, please wait and think again. A line from a bizarre saying.

2. 逗比励志语录

3. 我把你捧在手里是你是个杯子，我松手的时候你就是个玻璃渣子。

2. Comical and inspirational quotes 3. When I hold you in my hands, you are a cup. But when I let go, you turn into glass shards.

4. 想学习我，找点儿精髓，别让我一眼看穿了你。

4. If you want to learn from me, find some essence; don't let me see through you at a glance.

5. 我不是为了钱，我是因为生活。我不是要上床，我是因为爱你。

5. It's not about the money for me, it's because of life. I'm not just about getting into bed, I'm because I love you.

6. 逗比励志语录相关 文章 ：

6. Related articles on humorous and inspirational quotes:

7. 我虽然做不了有钱人的后代，但我一定要做有钱人的祖宗。

7. Though I cannot be the descendant of the wealthy, I must definitely be the ancestor of the wealthy.

8. 勿嘲人短，勿炫己长。

8. Do not mock others' shortcomings, and do not boast about your own strengths.

9. 请勿将烟头丢入便池中。

9. Do not throw cigarette butts into the toilet bowl.

10. 天时不如地利,地利不如人和,人和不如钱多。

10. Favorable timing is not as good as favorable geography, favorable geography is not as good as harmonious people, and harmonious people are not as good as having plenty of money.

11. 如果你不爱我，我就让你在我排山倒海的思念中淹死

11. If you don't love me, I'll let you drown in the overwhelming waves of my thoughts.

12. 卫生间卫生标语

12. Bathroom Sanitation Slogan

13. 从前，有一个捉迷藏公司，他们老板到现在还没找到

13. Once upon a time, there was a hide and seek company, and their boss has still not found them.

14. 弹指神功弹入盆，勿让水滴落地痕。

14. The Finger-Clicking Skill sends a shot into the basin, ensuring no water droplets leave a trace on the ground.

15. 走遍天下，冲倒不平。

15. Travel the world, topple the unjust.

16. 随手冲一冲，干净又轻松。

16. Just give it a quick rinse, and it's clean and easy.

17. 手纸请放纸篓里便后请用水冲洗洗。?>

17. Please put toilet paper in the waste bin and rinse with water after using it.

18. 有一次用语音报数的电子称称体重，我站上去的时候，它说："请大家排好队，一个一个上。"

18. On one occasion, I used an electronic scale with voice reporting to weigh myself, and when I stepped on it, it said, "Please line up and go one by one."

19. 女人真奇怪，不该知道的事，她们全知道;该知道的事，她们反而不知道。

19. Women are really strange; they know everything they shouldn't know; and they don't know what they should know.

20. 农村的墙上让我认为比较搞笑的标语有“你若酒驾，我就改嫁”。记得自己在回家的时候看到这样的一个标语，差点就笑了出来。这本身是一个让我们尽量的注意自己不要去酒驾的一个最普通不过的标语，但是却利用了一种比较诙谐幽默的方式，让我们认为，有一种特别搞笑的成分在里面。所以说这是我认为的比较搞笑的一点。

20. Among the slogans on rural walls, one that struck me as particularly humorous is "If you drive drunk, I'll remarry." I remember almost laughing out loud when I saw such a slogan on my way home. This is a very ordinary slogan that aims to remind us not to drive drunk, but it uses a rather playful and humorous approach, making us think that there's something particularly funny about it. Therefore, I consider this to be a rather humorous aspect.

21. 珍惜生命之水，关注点点滴滴。

21. Cherish the life-giving water and pay attention to every drop.

22. 希望我喜欢的人不要滚滚而来，更希望我不喜欢的人滚滚而去。

22. I hope the people I like do not come in a flood, and even more so, that the people I do not like go away in a flood.

23. 在这个连上厕所都要钱的年代里，没有什么不可能的。

23. In an era where even using the toilet costs money, nothing is impossible.

24. 总结一下就是：卖血洒泪，不给回报；画个大饼，骗你入坑。可笑的是，面试官还将之定义为狼性文化，但事实上，M去的只是一家初创公司，连组建一个像样的狼群都谈不上。

24. In summary, it is: selling blood with tears, without any return; painting a big pie in the sky, tricking you into a trap. What's可笑 is that the interviewer even defines this as a "wolf culture," but in fact, the company M went to is only a startup, not even mentioning forming a decent pack of wolves.

25. 男人喜好听话的女人，但男人若是 爱好 一个女人，就会人不知鬼不觉听她的话。

25. Men prefer women who are obedient, but if a man loves a woman, he will secretly follow her instructions without anyone noticing.

26. 如厕冲水了无痕，道德水功告成。

26. The toilet flushing leaves no trace, the moral waterwork is complete.

27. 男人赚钱后想和老婆离婚，男人赚不到钱老婆想和他离婚。

27. When a man earns money, he wants to divorce his wife; when a man can't earn money, his wife wants to divorce him.

28. 一切皆可贵，冲刷价更高。

28. Everything is valuable, but the washing price is even higher.

29. 如果我的感情失败的话，趴在地上的一定是对方

29. If my feelings fail, the one lying on the ground will definitely be the other person.

30. 唾沫是用来数钞票的，不是用来讲道理的。经典语句

30. Spittle is used for counting money, not for arguing. Classic saying.

31. 我开始厌恶这个患得患失忽冷忽热拼尽全力去逞强的自己。

31. I began to detest this self who is always worried about gaining and losing, who is hot and cold, and who exerts all his strength to show off.

32. 女友和我分居了，其实我们的性生活还是蛮蟹的——我性无能，她性冷淡……

32. My girlfriend and I have separated, but actually our sex life is quite satisfactory — I am impotent, and she is asexual...

33. 34您瞅准了，按那里冲．一般人我不告诉他。

33. 34 You've got it right, hit that spot. Usually, I don't tell ordinary people.

34. 25厕所经常保清新，洗手擦拭莫甩水，地板乾净不会毁。

34. The toilet is kept fresh and clean at all times; when washing hands, avoid splashing water, and the floor being clean will prevent damage.

35. 你会流泪，并不代表真的慈悲;我会微笑，并不代表一切都好。

35. You may shed tears, but that doesn't necessarily mean you are truly compassionate; I may smile, but that doesn't mean everything is alright.

36. 学校的功能是你想干什么，它就偏不让你干什么

36. The function of school is that whatever you want to do, it won't let you do.

37. 如果你不给别人方便，你将不能“方便”。

37. If you do not make it convenient for others, you will not be able to enjoy convenience yourself.

38. 设备真可贵，公德不可退。

38. The equipment is truly valuable, but public virtue cannot be diminished.

39. 注意个人卫生如厕后请洗手。

39. Pay attention to personal hygiene and wash your hands after using the toilet.

40. 工作任务短期内比较重或者自己效率问题导致的加班也就算了，但鼓励有事没事都留下来的加班文化真的无用又烦人。这类公司不知有没有意识到，加班假象的背后是员工正常上班时间的消极怠工和公司资源的长期占用、浪费，“养生式加班”谁不会？

40. It's understandable if the workload is heavy in the short term or due to personal efficiency issues, resulting in overtime. However, the culture of encouraging employees to stay late for no reason is both useless and annoying. Such companies may not realize that behind the illusion of overtime is the negative idleness of employees during normal working hours and the long-term occupation and waste of company resources. Who doesn't know how to "take care of one's health" through overtime?

41. 细微之处见公德，举手之间显文明。

41. In the smallest details, we see public virtue; in a gesture, we demonstrate civilization.

42. "同桌你听，我的肚子里好像有小宝宝在踢我" "说人话" "劳资饿了"。

42. "Hey, you sitting next to me, I feel like there's a little baby kicking me in my belly" "Speak human" "I'm hungry."

43. 不管朋友还是恋人，当我说“算了”的时候，其实是包含了我太多的失望。

43. Whether it's a friend or a lover, when I say "enough," it actually contains too much disappointment from me.

44. 成熟的一面是给外人看的幼稚的一面是给爱人看的。

44. The mature side is shown to outsiders, while the childish side is shown to the beloved.

45. 节约用水，从点滴开始。

45. Save water, start from every drop.

46. 九年义务 教育 只教会你装逼吗 是你混好了，还是TM我老了!

46. Compulsory nine-year education only teaches you to act cool, is it because you've made it big, or is it because I'm getting old, you son of a bitch!

47. 如厕后请勿忘关闭水龙头。

47. Do not forget to turn off the tap after using the toilet.

48. 表扬一个人，最好用公文；批评一个人，尽量用电话。

48. The best way to praise a person is through official documents; try to use the phone as much as possible when criticising someone.

49. 水是生命之源，请节约每一滴水。

49. Water is the source of life, please save every drop of water.

50. 13当我们心情愉快的时候，也别忘了让厕所的心情和我们一样愉快哟！

50. 13 When we are in a good mood, let's not forget to make the bathroom feel just as cheerful too!

51. 天下没有不花心的男人，只有没有能力花心的男人

51. There is no man who is not unfaithful in the world, only men who lack the ability to be unfaithful.

52. 14小坐片刻，很是舒心愉快；随手冲洗，很是文明礼貌。

52. A short sit is very comfortable and pleasant; washing by hand is very civil and polite.

53. 校园美丽，从厕所冲水开始。

53. The campus is beautiful, starting from the flushing of the toilets.

54. 孤单是你心里面没有人!寂寞是你心里有的人却不在身边。

54. Solitude is when there's no one in your heart! Loneliness is when someone is in your heart but not by your side.

55. 清明 节应该回小学初中扫扫墓，因为那里埋葬了你的青春

55. The Qingming Festival is a time when one should visit elementary and junior high school to sweep the tombs, as it is where your youth is buried.

56. 漂亮的女人像是放在展柜里的工艺品，欣赏的人很多，但买下的人只能一个人。

56. Beautiful women are like crafts displayed in showcases, with many people admiring them, but only one person can purchase them.

57. 这个概念很鸡贼，看似很暖心很温馨，但这类公司很多都有这样的现象：员工个人时间搞团建、要求员工对工作随时待命、强制要求员工用自己的社交帐号进行公司各类宣传……而当员工对这个“家”提出需求时，翻脸比翻书还快。

57. This concept is cunning, seemingly very heartwarming and cozy, but many such companies have this phenomenon: employees spend their personal time on team-building activities, require employees to be on call for work at any time, and force employees to use their own social media accounts for company promotions... But when employees put forward their needs to this "home," the company changes its attitude faster than flipping through a book.

58. 贴近文明靠近方便。

58. Closer to civilization, closer to convenience.

59. 表问我为什么每天都是六菜一汤，其实也没什么，就是有钱，就是任性!

59. Ask me why I have six dishes and one soup every day, actually, there's nothing special about it, it's just that I have money, and I can be arbitrary!

60. 向文明人致敬!

60. Salute to the civilized!

61. 前来百步紧，出后一身松。

61. When you approach, the pace quickens; once you leave, you feel at ease.

62. 小时候总感觉睡觉是多么浪费时间，长大后才发现能睡个好觉是一件多么奢侈的事情。

62. When I was young, I always felt that sleeping was such a waste of time, but only as I grew up did I realize how luxurious it is to have a good night's sleep.

63. 厕所经常保清新，洗手擦拭莫甩水，地板干净不会毁。

63. The toilet is always kept fresh and clean, when washing hands, don't splash water around, the floor stays clean and won't be damaged.

64. 女生收到不感兴趣的男生吹牛的时候，及时的力挽狂澜!

64. When a girl receives boasts from a boy she is not interested in, it's important to及时 intervene and turn the tide!

65. 水是生命之源，请节约用水。

65. Water is the source of life, please save water.

66. 我讨厌这种朋友，平常和你嘻嘻哈哈的。在你困难的时候，当做若无其事。

66. I hate such friends who laugh and joke with you all the time, but act as if nothing is wrong when you're in trouble.